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Should I run?

Published on August 11, 2010 by tornintwo

My boyfriend moved in a little over a month ago. He says he is completely in love with me and doesn"t want to break up. I know he said he had to work alot to pay off some debts but even when he is not working he is sleeping in his taxi. He gets angry with me when I tell him I am starving for his affection. We have been together a year and have only had sex about a dozen times. He still kisses me alot and calls me all day long. He says he wants to have sex but he is just busy and tired. On Saturday, I had found that he was looking at an escort service on line. I packed up his things and told him to leave. He said, I owe him an apology because he was just looking at the pics and I shouldv'e spoke with him first to find out why. He says he is insecure with living with me now and afraid I will put him out whenever he does something wrong so he wants to get his own apartment. He said, he misses his things that are in storage, going home and cooking his own dinners and unwinding from the day alone. He told me I could have the keys to his apt. and stay with him anytime. I have never been treated like this before and don't know what to do. HELP

ANSWERS

Usually I would've told you to light up your bf ass, but I will hold off on that suggestion for now. An an adult sex is an important aspect of a loving relationship and you are right in needing more sexual satisfction. Not having it is affecting your relationshp, affecting you and your reaction to your guy.

You didn't say how old is your man. If he is a grown man then guys do want their own private space to relax and unwind. When you two moved in together he may have felt that he lost his own little part of the world so he chose to keep his taxi as the place to call his own 'guy zone'.

Guys also need sex, and sexual stimulation (as if that was any news to anyone!, lol) But if you are unavailable when he is home, or you want to 'talk' about things instead of having sex then he would take the easy way out and look at victoria secret magazine or just pics of naked women, and / or more.

Men also are not great communicators (again, not the first time you would've heard this! lol) so I doub;t your guy ever talked about his 'needs'

I don't think you should walk away from the relationship. and I do think you over-reacted by asking your guy to leave without asking the questions first. or asking others for advice first before taking action. If you want to fix the situation, there are several parts to address. Your need for sexual satisfaction, his need for sexual satisfaction, his need for his space. I think these are things you guys can talk about and perhaps make some minor adjustments in your life/schedules to be sure both of you have what it needs to keep you 2 happy in a relationship.

May be your guy doesn't need to sign a 6-month / 1-year lease anywhere. May be he can be roommate some where for a couple months while you guys sort things out. If it all start to work out then he can move back in. But you gotta win his trust back and ask questions first before taking action.

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