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Should i give my ex a chance...will it be safe?
hi..i am in a situation here where my relation with my ex was a 5 yr relationship and things were promising and good in the first 4 yrs but in the 5th yr things started getting bitter as there was a lot of immaturity in the relationship of ours, my ex had his priorities changed,got new friends,started spending time wid them more..it only made me more clingy and needy for him...that was the worst phase of my life..the fights were so bitter...all it did was left me crying and him getting more and more stubborn, friends,family everyone got against this,wanted me to move on wid dis..but the relationship was so dominating it left me wonder where m i going wrong,,i dont know whether the guy used to get dominating telling me always how i have been making a fuss about every issue..or was it really my fault..the questions literally killed me,,ours was not bad relationship,,no one cheated ever,no one was abusive..but is mental abusion not enough which came onto me in the 5th yr..?,,,friends started telling me guy is taking u for granted..the guy started saying "i would like to be with my friends rather then u"...made me feel like shit...i was in a stage of life where i was fighting myself...what was i doing..i chose to give up so many times..i did...again went back to him...a tough time for me..felt lonely..had his gud things to remember,was scared of the world..was a completely dependent fool..and made the same mistake again and again..and finally at one point..the stupidity stopped..when one night i went back to him begging him to plz take me back in his life..yet d most important thing for him next morning was to go for a bachelor trip with friends..den at that point i came to know where i stood in his life..the guy was never ready to change..nd y wud he?..i dont know what made him like dis? was it my fault or was it natural or was it his friends or whatever..i was broken...it took me 6 months to get over him...i was myself again..confident..was shining..the reason i broke up was that hanging on to him and over thinking made me sick and loose myself...i dont blame anyone..it was my fate...yes the guy tried to enter my life after a month...again after 2 months...i was unavailable...i was strong...now after 6 months..the guy comes again and says he is a changed person now..he realizes everything..this shit has been repeated the whole year..and he was never a changed person...now he says he wants me back...he says "u have got a maturity now,,,i have got the understanding...lets try and make things better...i promise you wont regret"..you have always got the soft corner in you and u give in...i did that...i m giving him time...but every day..the past flashes in front of me...i cannot forget what i have been through...its like deja vu...every thing is happening again...i have been asking everyone what m i supposed to do..yes he is showing a lot of extra care and concern..but how can i become sure of how much time its gonna last???..i have this gut feeling this lubby dubby nature has an expiry date..i cannot trust the guy..and think of myself as a fool to get back...the guy is talking a lot of sense..says realizes everything..says will make up every thing...yet cannot trust him...he says it will take time to forget everything..how is it possible?..and even if i forget everything..am i sure that he will not do all that again..or we will not fight like animals like we used to do in past almost everyday..i feel stuck...he is a genuine guy and i know der is an adjustment in every relation and an understanding,,,and also that with good i will have to accept the bad...but it just scares me a lot...the guy says he was influenced..he lost his mind..how can i believe that he will not loose his mind again?..plz help me.