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Should I call it quits?

Published on April 6, 2010 by onlylonely

I guess it was my fault we started to get to know each other online? I have known this boy for eleven months now, and I have liked him for ten. I've admitted my feelings to him the first time: two weeks after I realized I liked him. He obviously didn't feel the same, and we went through weeks of awkwardness. Somehow, though, we were able to become friends. But my feelings never faded. Day after day, we were always there for each other. Sure, he could be rude sometimes, and we always argued over meaningless things. I still never got over him. All the late nights we stayed up chatting, and the atmosphere of complete trust and honesty still hold a special place in my heart. But eventually, all the fighting caught up to us. He'd make jokes that would make me jealous, and I'd lash out. But he seemed to have never caught onto my jealousy. A month ago, I told him I couldn't be friends anymore and how I felt and implied that I wanted all or nothing. He even said that we should stop talking to avoid a repeat of my feelings for him. However, it's been a month now, and he's messaged me 3 times. The topics he talked about were school-related, but he has friends that could also help him. Why me? Yet I couldn't help it and I messaged him ONCE. Again, with a school related topic. However, he was a COMPLETE jerk to me. He told me to ask someone that lived near me. I said "are you seriously doing this right now?" and he replied "..." and gave me the answer to my question. I don't know what's up with him and his mood swings. He seems to have more than I do, and I'm a girl. My question is why is he hanging on when he doesn't want to be with me? Why is he a jerk at some times, yet sincere at others? Should I just tell him to back off and stop talking to me for good, or pretend like everything's okay? And if I should just break the whole thing off, how? A letter? Actually messaging him? There's no way I can do it in person because we're strangers in person and my knees go weak every time we're alone. It's like my heart wants him in my life, yet my brain knows he doesn't belong there.

Just so there's no confusion: I'm about to turn 17. Who said there can't be young love, right?


He's just being a jerk. I've been in this exact situation when I was in high school. The guy knew I liked him but he had no interest in me so he'd be flirty and nice to me one minute and then a total jerk the next. He's using you to boost his ego. He wants to keep you interested so he can feel good about himself but then pushes you aside when he doesn't need said ego boost because he doesn't care about you or your feelings. Trust me when I say that he does know what he's doing. He knows that you like him. He knows when he's making you jealous. He is just after your reactions. There are more mature guys out there to try and have relationships with. Don't waste anymore time on this one. Break the whole thing off and just stop talking to him. Don't be his friend. Don't be his anything. Over time you'll get over him and find a real boyfriend.