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Should girls make the first move or should they wait?

Published on January 25, 2010 by touchofsophistication

I'm a 20-year-old college student and I went on a university sponsored service trip abroad with some students. This one guy and I hit it off but nothing happened on the trip since the nature of the trip wasn't very..."romantic".

Now that we're back at school, should I wait for him to make the first move or should I go for it? I'm traditionally old-fashioned but I'm also getting a bit impatient. He's a shy guy so I can give him that, but we're in that stage of relationship where I feel like he's into me too, but neither of us are sure if the other likes each other.

Thanks for your help!


Sure why not. Just ask him out casually and see where it goes from there. There's nothing wrong with that. Ask him if we wants to grab a coffee sometime or a bite to eat. If you don't ask you might never know. I've always been the one to ask guys out. I think women are so wrapped up in tradition that they often don't realize men are in some cases more shy than most women. And you even said that he's shy guy, so go for it.

         Go for it.If he feels the same way, you both win.If you don't try, and he can't make the first move, you both loose.If you try ,and he is not interested, you still win.You will not suffer the pain of waiting, wondering and wishing.Ask him out and be free from not knowing.

If ya feel like he's probably not makin' move because he's shy, then you could drop some serious hints. Trouble is, our kind aren't good at reading even the most obvious clues.

I know it sounds very "high school," but if you have a mutual friend you could clue in and have them let the guy know you're into him, that might go a long way toward emboldening him in your relationship.

I am also old fashioned, and I usually go by the rule of "he's just not that into you" if he doesn't make a move. Just my opinion, but I always feel if the guy is interested, he will make an effort.

Tell him exactly how you feel. Being that he is shy, he may not tell you until it is too late. Have a get-together with him and see how it will go from there.