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Problems with the new fiance/father of my child.

Published on May 25, 2013 by ashleyaallen

Hi Kelly. My name is Ashley, I am currently 19 years old and I have been engaged to my fiance for about 3 months. We dated for 6 months before this. We found out 6 months ago that I was pregnant, and our lives took a huge turn. We were not engaged at the time, but he proposed to me shortly after. He has ensured me that he did not propose just because of the baby, that it's because he wants to spend his life with me as well. I moved in with him shortly after we found out I was pregnant, and we have very little space. His grandfather also lives with us due to his health. My fiance works everyday atleast 8 hours a day, but the hours differ. Before I moved in he was used to going fishing and playing football and basketball and videogames with the guys all the time. We've had arguements because I do not like his friends being here every night. They come over around 5:00 and stay until 10:00 or midnight and it drives me crazy. He's a very quiet and closed up person so he hates conflict which is why he won't ask him friends to leave or to not come over as much. We also have been aruging recently because I feel as if he doesn't spend enough time with me. We didn't have too much time to date before this pregnancy, so I missed out on that part of the relationship. I also do not work and am currently on summer break for college so I am home everyday. I garden and go walking when I can but I can't afford gas mustless going out with my friends, so it leaves me stuck at home. When he comes home I know that he needs down time from working since he's taken care of himself his entire life. He's been through a lot of stuff that makes me understand why he crawls into a ball and doesn't tell me how he feels. Sometimes we will argue at night once his friends have left because I tell him how I feel about him not spending time with me, and in return he will roll over and go to sleep or just lay there and not say anything. He says he doesn't know what to say, so i'm not sure if it's due to the fact that he truly doesn't know what to say or that he just doesn't want to open up to me. I know a lot about his past but I had to find it out from his family, not from him. That in turn makes me not feel like he can talk to me about stuff and hurts pretty badly. He admitted to not wanting to give up the stuff he loves yet, but I explained to him that i'm not asking him to give anything up, that i've given everything up already because I had to, but that I need him to support me. He never gives me back massages and I cook and clean after him and sometimes I just don't feel appreciated. I'm messaging you because I don't know what to do. I know he loves me without a doubt but how do I get him to open up? How do I stop feeling so clingy when I know I need more being pregnant. I want to be happy again and it seems like the only time I can be happy is when he spends a little time with me and then we spend time in the bedroom, it's the only way that I truly feel wanted, is that moment.

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