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Now or Never?

Published on October 1, 2013 by browneyed

I've been dating a guy long distance on and off for about two years. I fell for him early on and from my point of view have always wanted more from the relationship than he has. About a year ago I told him I wanted more from the relationship and wanted to see him more than we were at the time. He said he was happy with the way things were, so I bolted. After that, he made efforts to make up for things, but I was very skeptical and kept him at bay. I started seeing someone else locally, but he wouldn't let go and since he, long distance guy, is the one I truly wanted, I returned. We have been trying to rebuild our relationship. This past weekend I told him I want his heart and asked if I have it and he basically responded that I have at times, but not presently. Here's my question: Is this a now or never situation? If I don't have his heart right now, after two years, will I ever? If not, then I have to move on, although I really love him. On the other hand, if I understood correctly that I've had it before, am I in the process of getting back?

ANSWERS

I think you need to have a candid discussion with him. Let him know that you are interested in a long term relationship with him but you need to know he is in too. And base your next move on what he says.

What a terrible thing to have to hear. Do I have your heart? Sometimes but not now.

I'm sorry, I can imagine what you are feeling right now. I've been in a similar relationship before. Part of the attraction is the push/pull which keeps you in a suspended state of hoping to win his heart.

But he is telling you with his actions and his words, that he doesn't feel as strongly for you as you feel for him. Believe him.

Please break it off with this guy and move on with your life. You WILL find love with a man who gives you 100%.

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