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My Man has threaten to leave me a couple times does he mean it?

Published on August 6, 2009 by craigsgrl1

He has threaten to leave or told me to leave, doe shtis mean he is going to want out eventually? He always apologizes later on after he says it. But he shows no signs of leaving me. I think he just gets angry and says these mean things to get my attention.


I'd ba wary of the man who threatens to leave. If he says this and stays, then he's letting you know that he's a liar and willing to say outrageous things to keep you in your place. Or, he could be biding his time and hedging his bets, that way, whenever he decideds it's the right time to take off, he can say that he told you he was going to leave. This is someone who doesn't respect your relationship.

Be aware that he is displaying signs of an abuser. Eventually, him telling you that may not be enough to let him get his way, so be very aware of the things he says when he is angry. If he has to say mean things in order to "get your attention" then he has no idea how to properly communicate his feelings and express his anger. Is this the type of person that you want to be with? Next time he threatens to leave, that should be your cue to get up and go. No one deserves to be with a person who keeps them in a relationship with threats. If you got married, would you want him saying that to your children? Would you want them to feel the uncertainty of not having a parent there? It doesn't matter if he acts upon these threats of bouncing, the fact that he can't find any better way to express his feelings should be a giant, barn sized red-flag. Tell him to get some help or go find someone who values you and is willing to give you security.

You need to get out NOW!!! This guy sounds like a loose cannon. That apologizing after he's said it? That's what abusers do, and he's abusing you whether you know it or not. He's abusing you mentally, verbally and emotionally. The fact that you don't act on anything is letting him know that you'll accept his behavior.

OMG!!! yep you have to do something upon that. I was in a relationship for 5 yrs my then bf would always threaten me that he was going to leave me probably like the 4th yr and it became like a routine every time we would fight he would say that. Many times i repeated it to him not to say that because one day i was going to get fed up and say "fuck it", and girl that's exactly what i did. He would take me for granted all the time. But if you say something you have to go through it not just say it and not do anything about it. So I would suggest to tell him that even tho sometimes it really hurts:/..

I totally agree with Symian! If he is saying this, evidentally he is thinking it. I feel like if he is saying it, then he needs to keep it moving and never come back. I tell women all the time, don't be afraid to end a realationship. We women are so scared to be alone, and start all over, because we know it will take a while to find somebody to settle with. Hell, It's been 3 years since me and my daughter's father broke up, and I still haven't found anybody. But forget that, I would definitely not be putting up with that threat. I remember being with my daughters father, and if I would confront him about something, he would say "maybe we should just break up" and then I would say "ok forget it". Just thinking about that now, I can't believe I would say "ok forget it" just so he could have his way and not answer no questions. What I shouldve been saying was "ok, well leave MF, and don't bring your A_ _ back" Because I couldve easily been with somebody else. But just looking back at the situation, I was very insecure, I had quit doing things for myself for him! Like getting my nails done, my hair, I quit buying clothes, because he would complain about saving money, and insult me by saying that I couldnt save money. But this was just a way to mold me into being the way he wanted me to be. And I regret that sooo much. I will never let that happen again! I will never forget it. He use to ask me Why do I want to buy new clothes, and whats wrong with the old clothes I have. So I would say, I guess you are right. But one day, I went to his job, and he was complementing this girl to me, telling me "See that girl right there? She be hooked up, she wears an outfit, and have the whole setup, the hat, the belt, and have shoes to match" And I will never forget, that hurted my feelings, because he was admiring her for being fixed up and looking good, But stupid old me, just fell into his trap, looking stupid like a plain jane. I will never let anybody make me feel insecure again!! That way if a another guy threaten to leave me, "fine, leave, bye" This may sound corny, But you have to stand up for yourself. Don't ever let a man threaten you to have his way! Kick him to the curb, and that will teach him not to be saying that ever again!