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My boyfriend wants to wait until after college to get married, but I can't help but wonder why not now?

Published on September 27, 2010 by allymarin

My boyfriend & I have been together for 2.5 years and we get along very well. We live 2 hours apart and we both work full time and go to college full time. My boyfriend has made comments about wanting to marry me, but he is insistent we wait until after college. He thinks if we get married now and I got pregnant, we may have to drop out of school to support ourselves and he is worried we won't accomplish the dream jobs we have been working towards. I know waiting is probably the smarter thing to do, but I also grew up listening to stories about my parents who were already married at my age. I secretly wouldn't mind the idea of having to get creative with dinner ideas and date nights even if we have no money. A part of me worries that he is trying to buy time, but I also know he has always been the practical type. But the dreamer in me can't help but wonder, why not now? Would it really be the downfall of our schooling?


Giving him the benefit of the doubt as the practical one, getting married while both in school would be very stressful. I do agree with him there. Working full time as well as a full classload I'm sure is already tiring, don't you agree?

Have you considered suggesting setting a date say 6 months after graduation? Get your degrees, that's so important then there's plenty of time to plan a fantastic wedding and everything else that goes along with getting married after you're finished with school.

I have to agree-- I think he's being practical! Being married isn't cheap-- you have new bills, rent or a mortgage, and in addition to that you have a spouse who needs your time and attention. If you're both in school, finish up with that and then talk about marriage. With your degrees, you'll be able to get better jobs and can better support yourselves in marriage. Waiting stinks when you want to marry someone, but it's often better in the long run. The "creative" date nights are only fun for so long before you start to wish you had a little more money! It will work out for you-- best wishes!

He is a smart guy. My boyfriend is one of theese types too. He wont propose to me untill he ends university, he will have permanent place to live, normal salary, and stable job, to give his family everything they need... it means about 4 years more... and yeah, im willing to wait that long. He is being practical and he cares about his loved ones, he doesnt want stress so he plans. really smart guy...

Take him at his word and enjoy your lives together,don't try to pressure him into it,I believe he's doing the right thing.Love does conquer all,let's be real,to be a happy married couple your going to need to be financially stable,if you get married and your broke,you are setting yourself up for a divorce,problems will arise, so be patience and work with your future husband! GOOD LUCK!

Your boyfriend is a smart guy, there are few people who think about their present and future. Already he has calculated the time and events that may happen after getting married. you need to plan for possibilities of the future when you are married and yet you need to further up your studies since you are at college and working too. haven't it crossed your mind that working and studying at the same time is tiring. What if you are married, studying, husband and a kid at the same time?

Think about it dear. GOOD LUCK!