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Lovemaking too scripted… Little to no passion

Published on January 20, 2014 by venice_m

We’re 64/59, m/f, 9+ year relationship, snowbirds for the last four years and now in Florida. For the last three winters we live together in FL for 6-1/2 months. Last spring sold my home up North and now we’ll be living together all the time.

I’m writing this… I’m the male. We do well on lots of levels… and not so well on others. This question is about the lovemaking… what can / should I do? In 9+ years we’ve made love only once at night, never during the day, never anywhere but in the bed. Our routine is to do “it” in the morning.

The routine is triggered with her saying, “We could take care of the worker bee this morning.” That initiates the routine. We head to our respective bathrooms, brush our teeth and return to bed. Upon return to bed she spreads out a bath towel widthwise on the bed and we position ourselves so our butts are on the towel. The towel is to not muss the sheets. She reaches into the night stand for a lube lotion and lubes herself. We hold one another, kiss, and caress. My caresses begin at her shoulders and face, shoulders and back, shoulders and breasts. Her caresses find their way to my “worker bee” and soon bring me to full arousal. My caresses find their way to her mons at which time her caresses transition from “worker bee” to her breasts. From there I masturbate her to (what I believe to be) climax. We kiss –broken off and on- during this time. After her climax we lie holding one another… a bit spent for a short time. She reaches over to the nightstand, gets a Kleenex tissue and hands it to be so I can dry the lube from my finger. I do so and hand it back to her. We hold one another again and kiss… once again she caresses “worker bee” to erection and then she moves down in the bed and orally takes on “worker bee”. She is very adept and in a few minutes I signal her I’m about to release –she neither swallows or spits- but I must signal her to stop oral before I release. That’s the routine 2/3 of the time… the other 1/3 I draw her back to kiss and we have intercourse with her on top. Either way our start to finish 95% of the time does not exceed 10-15 minutes… remember it’s only in the morning and there’s a day ahead that must be started…

And this routine is doesn’t change, hasn’t changed for years. Frequency is from once to thrice every ten to fourteen days.

Don’t get me wrong – I like it… but I often feel it’s more about getting it done than anything else.

Your thoughts?

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