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I am getting mixed signals--how do I know what he really wants?

Published on June 6, 2010 by doodlebug

I have been seeing a co-worker off and on over the past year. We ended our relationship after 6-7 months. The past 2 1/2 months we started back up. About 6 weeks ago, we ended up having sex at work. Since then, I feel like he is avoiding me. When I ask what is going on he tells me he feels we are being watched and we need to "lay low" for a little while. I took that as, he wanted to end it. So I left him alone but still kept our friendship going. The past couple of weeks, he is back flirting, hitting on me, touching, etc....Can anyone tell me what they think is going on? Do you think he was telling me the truth? Or just giving me a line? Today at work there was a lot of touching/feeling going on between us. Then he kept his distance. Which is not what he would have done before. But, again, as we were fooling around, he said that we need to be careful. Do you think he is just afraid we are going to get caught or what? When we ended our relationhip the first time, it was over something stupid and we were and still are very careful not to let anyone know what is going on between us. We work in a kitchen and there are always people around, so we have to be careful what we do. To complicat this, we are both married. He is 30 and I am 44. I know that this is a big difference in ages, but I am in really good shape and look at least 10 years younger than I am. He knows my age and this does not bother him. Any advise on how to read a guys mind?


I hate to be blunt here, but I think you've got more important things to worry about. You're both married and cheating on your spouses. When has that even been a good thing? Shouldn't you be spending your time and effort either making your marriage work or leave? Rather than spending your time trying to make your affair work?