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How do I tell my F*** Buddy that I want more then that?

Published on December 7, 2010 by dawn83

Me and this guy have been seeing each other on and off for over a year.  But the past couple of months we have been seeing each other on a weekly regular basis. We always hang out and chat for at least an hour or 2 befor we "do the deed". But to stay within the guidlines of being as F buddy we never cuddle or anything. He always calls me when he's drunk to tell me he's thinking about me. At the beginging we both said that we just want to be single and He had just gotten out of a long relationship him self. So I understand the need to be single and him wanting to always go out with his guy friends. The last time i was with him he seemed like he was acting a little nervous around me. I really like him and want to be more then just what we are. But of course I'm afriad if I tell him and he doesnt feel the same way I will just scare him away. What do I do?

ANSWERS

I wish I could give you the right answer. I guess you have to decide if you are willing to lose what you have with this guy if you decide to tell him you want more from the relationship. I know I am in a relationship with a guy. We happen to both be married, and it started off as an affair. When I wanted more, he ended it. We are back together, but only as F*** Buddies. We no longer cuddle or anything before we hook up like we use too. I too would like more. But, I know each time I suggest anything, he gets mad at me and says I'm getting too close. I like what I have, so I too am trying to figure out how not to scare him away but still get more out of our relationship. Right now because I asked why he is distant lately, he is avoiding me. So a long story short. Make sure before you say anything, you are willing to give up what you already are getting. But, since neither of you are in a relationship, he may be willing to take it to the next level. Good luck!!!!

Nothing else to do but be honest! It's only a matter of time before the subject has to be addressed. Who knows, maybe he feels the same. Or - like you said, you could scare him away. Either way, you have to tell him at some point. It's not like you've violated a contract or something. "Feelings" develop without being planned. If you do scare him off, as much as you think it's a bad thing - it would probably be for the best. People can be in a relationship and still have their "buddy time". You deserve someone who wants to be with you in the same way you want to be with him!

The answer is in your ques., decide if you can live with the the worst of the situation or not. If not, learn not to put yourself in that situation again. Right now you're not a f@ck buddies, you're a booty call (check definitions of ea.). All too often people get in your predicament wanting more out of the relationship, but settles for whatever is left ie being a f>>k buddy/booty call (been there, done that, glad I know better now) . In the end you have to love and respect yourself. Wasn't there a song about booty calls?

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