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How do I get over the regret?

Published on June 4, 2010 by earthyhistlover

I'm in love with my boyfriend and I love him more than anything. We have dated since our junior year of high school and we are now rising seniors in college at the same university. However, we have broken up several times in the past, at times in our relationship both of us (who were each others first, in almost every aspect concerning relationships) were worried or concerned about whether each other was the right person, we were unsure from our lack of experience in the relationship section. He had hurt me in the past and I have hurt him by leaving and dating someone else when things turned rough. Things are great now, I'm happy and feel really lucky to be where I am with him. Our communication is so much better and I feel like we've grown a lot together and on our own, realizing where we want to be- with each other and being active, going places and doing fun things. My only question, is how do I get over these feelings of regret from dating Mr. Wrong while we were broken up? I did learn a lot from this experience, and I feel like if I did not have time away from my boyfriend when things went so downhill, I would not be where I am today, happy. (since we both realized what we wanted and realized we lost each other, and grew up)

ANSWERS

If you were broken up with your boyfriend when you dated Mr Wrong, there's really no reason to feel regret at this point. You weren't cheating and as you said, you learned a lot from the experience. That's a good thing, right? Your breakup period was part of your journey together. Sometimes we have detours along the way.

If you have some unresolved feelings about the Mr Wrong period, get those feelings out. Journaling those feelings can help. Write down what's bothering you, get it all on paper and out of your mind. When you let go of the regret, you can be fully present with your boyfriend. You don't want the regret to get in the way of the wonderful relationship you have now.

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