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How can I stop my previous bad relationship (and marriage) from affecting my new great relationship?

Published on March 5, 2010 by hurtinnd

I am recently divorced and have been in a relationship with my new guy for 6 months. He is the complete opposite of my ex; loving, sweet, attentive, and so many other great qualities. My marriage was short (only two years) but we were together for 9 years. I should have gotten out when I first experienced emotional abuse from him, which only escalated after the first 3 years of dating. I guess I had just decided that I couldn't do any better. Even though there was the abuse I rationalized, that deep down he loved me and that he was my future. Eventually, after finding out for sure that he had been with at least two other women over the course of our relationship, that for me was the last straw. There was no love and now he was unfaithful so I decided there was nothing left. I have had a hard time dealing with the abuse from my past. I have horrible nightmares, I get in "funks" where I just shut out the world, even my new guy. I just don't know how to move forward.