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How can I get my sex drive a boost???

Published on November 5, 2012 by kcperez

Okay, before I had my daughter, she is now 15 months, my huband and I always used to have sex every day and night. Haha..but now I that my daughter is here..we or should I say, myself does not have that sex drive anymore and I want to change it up now..its been a very long time. I am not a "skinny person either" I have some meat on myself. I don't feel beautiful about myself I just see A LOT of flaws of my own body. PLEASE SOME ONE HELP ME. THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME!!!!


Welp! I have definitely been there before. Figure out why you don't feel beautiful. Is it because you feel tired or is it your actual appearance? If it's both, try working out in the morning before she wakes up. That always gave me an energy boost and I felt good about myself afterwards because I felt like I had accomplished something before the day even started. As far as the sex goes...get into the mindset. If you don't have time to include foreplay, at least relax and just enjoy the feeling. I'm sure you can remember how active it used to be. Try thinking about that to get in the mood. I hope this helps!

The latter part of your entry reveals the problem - you have a poor self body image. From what you've said, I'd guess you put on some weight during pregnancy that didn't come off after the baby arrived. That plus lack of sufficient sleep with a baby in the house (and maybe some stretch marks or looseness from the birth?) have YOU feeling unattractive about yourself and figuring your husband can't be finding you attractive either. You may also still be suffering from some lingering post-partum depression (seriously - ask your OB/GYN about this possibility)

Be rest assured - if he isn't saying he finds you unattractive, he DOESN'T find you unattractive. If he wants sex with you, you're looking good to him.

Here's what I answered on a different site to a woman who didn't think her husband found her attractive....

If you’re naked and smiling for your man, he’s not thinking, “Ewe, gross – cellulite!” He’s thinking, “YES – thank you, God! Papa’s gonna get laid!”

If you’ve got some body parts that jiggle, he wants to see what activities you’ll join him in to make them jiggle even faster (and then jiggle again a few minutes later once he’s caught his breath and is ready for a second go).

If you had a body as slim as you think yours ought to be, most guys who see you would be thinking, “That girl needs to eat something!”

Most men like you to be on top, and ALL men want you to leave the lights on when making love – that’s because they like what they’re seeing.

If we have any complaint about your bodies, it’s that you don’t let us play with them NEARLY enough.

The number one thing a man finds attractive about a women in bed is ENTHUSIASM. He doesn’t care if you’re a blond; he doesn’t care if you’ve got a set of DD’s; he doesn’t care that you have a flat belly; he doesn’t care what dress size you wear. What matters to him is that you’re in his bed, that it’s precisely where you want to be, and that it’s specifically because of HIM that you are excited to be there. The best compliment you can ever pay him is to have a good time while you’re there.

If you can think “I’m unattractive”, while at the same time fighting off a husband who can’t keep his hands off you, you need to have your head examined!

We’ll take a life with happy and cheerful “3″ over one with a “10″ who’s a bitchy drama queen every time – and thank God for His blessings.