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Helping a friend

Published on April 10, 2009 by mango

My friend is madly in love with a man who is horrible to her. He cheats on her, spends all her money and he demeans and belittles her. I've told her how I feel and tried to encourage her she deserves better, but now she's pregnant with his baby. How can I save her from marrying an abusive man and bringing her child into that relationship.

ANSWERS

You cannot save her. Don't even think that it's your job to save her. All you can do is listen to her and help her ask the right questions of herself that will hopefully lead her in the direction of saving herself. It looks like she already has a "bad guy" in her life so you don't want be the next one. If you force her to leave the relationship now, she will think of you as bad guy when she's all alone with a baby. But if you help her to grow stronger and gather the strength to leave on her own, she will be thanking you instead of blaming you in the end.

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