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Is he ready?

Published on August 12, 2012 by toulouse

So I have been good friends with this guy for around a year and there started to be some chemistry between us but we both agreed it would be a bad idea even though we have always had a connection that everyone has noticed - then he ended up with another girl and our friendship more or less stayed the same and as close until a few moths in then he hardly contacted me or anything anyway he dated this girl for 9 months and she was cheating on him for most of it. Anyway they are over however still having sex, but are both seeing other people. A week or so after they broke up we both ended up at the same party and he was kissing a random girl however then we went for a walk and ended up kissing aswell - however Once back at the party he continued to kiss the other girl. We hung out since and things were back to when we are best friends just a bit more cuddly and cute which is really nice - we both don't want people to know we are hooking up but whenever we go out in a group of people he flirts with everyone and ends up kissing a few people. It's only been a month since he broke up with her which hit him pretty hard, but I do really like him and I want to be more than just friends who occasionally hook up, how do I do that?


If you want to be more than friends who sometimes hook up, it is up to you to set some boundaries. If you accept things the way they are, like him kissing another girl, then you, then her again, then that's how things will stay. If he was hit hard by his breakup, he likely is not ready to be involved with you the way you want to be with him. You can try a direct approach- tell him how you feel and what you want. If he tells you he's not ready to be in a relationship, respect that, but respect your own needs and boundaries too. It can be tempting to just enjoy what he is willing to offer, but in the long run it may cause you significant pain and could cost you your friendship.