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He is already lying. Should I keep dating him?

Published on April 22, 2013 by confusedbambi

Hey, I have been seeing this guy for 3 months, and for three weeks, we've been an official couple. Soon, I was to discover (a mix up – I mistook his phone for mine) that he was still meeting up with his ex. When I asked him directly whether he was still meeting her, he lied without even blushing and discussed with me for two hours without even admitting it in the end (I on the other hand didn’t want to admit I mistook his phone for mine – I didn’t want him to think I was a crazy stalker bitch or plain stupid that early in the relationship). I decided to let it go because I am actually very certain that he likes me a whole lot and that I am in fact the most important person in his life. When he left his email account open on my computer and I saw an email starting with “Hey my love” as I was about to close it, I couldn’t help but read it. It was from yet another girl who he – as I read – had asked to meet in the park Sunday afternoon. I had spent all weekend with him, from early Friday till Sunday afternoon and left his place, because he wanted to go watch football with his mates. The email said that the girl and he had caught up at six (during the time the match was). He came to my place to spend the evening with me at 8.30 (during the course of that night I found the email). When I asked him precisely what he had been doing all afternoon, he told me all about the football and how he had only left the bar at 8.15 where they watched the match. Even when I directly asked him “Are you lying to me and catching up with another girl?” he insisted he was just at bar. Now, I know these are all warning signs and I should get out as long as I still can. I also know that he spend three days with me and only 2 hours with another girl – and really, that wouldn’t be a problem, if she wasn’t calling him “my love” or if he had just told me. On the other hand, I do truly believe that he cares for me and would never purposely hurt me, and maybe just can’t quite let go of his single life yet. Nevertheless, should I really be with a guy that can look me straight into the eyes and lie? And how can I be sure that he will stop seeing other girls – without intruding his privacy again?


All depends on how much you love him, You guys are not married or engaged and single bachelors will do what they want and that's not to say we believe you mistook his phone for your because even if that was the case many of us would not feel the need to snoop in other peoples property as you did. I have friends who lie for no reason at all when they don't feel the need to be upfront about their platonic female friendships. You may use the " Hey my Love" intro as a precursor to assuming you know the female is a sexual friend and still be very wrong. I'd say your already stalker-ish to be snooping and you may have intentionally mistook phones, nonetheless no one can prove you did this deliberately and intentionally-neither can you prove he had a date for ten minutes with his female called "Hey my love", do you get where I am going? When you look for things you will find dirt, so I would just say the score is even 1-1, and move past this and act like you apologized for snooping and you didn't see his texts and forgive him for not getting your approval or permission to have platonic friends, which by the way he doesn't need as a bachelor or single guy in a relationship. Two wrongs never make a right. Keep it moving and don't ask too many question