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Why Did He Try to Choke Me During Sex?

Published on April 22, 2011 by sexygirl

I don't know what to do. I have been dating this guy for a few weeks, and we finally had sex last night. While we were doing stuff, he put one hand on the front of my neck and started gently squeezing. I bugged out and slapped his hand. He said he thought it would turn me on! I have heard of perverted priests and regular people getting off on this suffocation, but i don't like it! Why would he assume I would? What should I do?

ANSWERS

You have to strongly tell him that you don't like to be chocked. You have to be strong and steady. Tell him that you don't like the way even though some girls like it.

Perhaps you could go down on him and bite him really hard. Tell him you thought he might like it.... Of course, he might.... then it is up to you. Seriously though.... if on the first time for sex with you he is that violent without asking.... I would start looking elsewhere

SexyGirl,

That's very scary. You were brave and very smart to get out of there safely. Someone is watching over you.

You already know this: If this is the very first time you had sex with this man, and he tried to choke you, there is only one sensible thing to do: Get out now. He charmed you a couple of weeks, and made you think he really cared, but ... you get the point.

Next step is to protect yourself. This man is willing to take chances with your life. If you haven't already, I would start by telling someone close to you and documenting it.

I am sure you've covered the basics: • Ask people who live and/or work near you to keep an eye out • I assume you've already defriended him on Facebook. • Have your script ready: If he calls, tell him you never want to hear from him again. That should be enough, but if he doesn't accept that and gets pushy or charming, tell him you have signed documentation that he assaulted you and that you've given it to your family and friends.

You did the right thing by telling someone. It's not your fault that he's a sick puppy. It's not your fault that you got tricked. Going through this is like getting a vaccination: it hurts but it will protect you in the future. You've had a valuable life-long lesson. It's important for women to learn to know men better before they sleep with them.

So what's next? By saying no to him, you are getting stronger. Each time you stand up for yourself and refuse bad treatment, you become more attractive to emotionally healthy men.

Good job!

He should not have assumed anything. You do see, on some porn sites, when a man is having intercourse with a woman, the man puts his hand around her neck and gently squeezes. This does turn on some women but should be talked about before actually trying it. The guy could have thought that he did not want to be boring and predictable by just doing it the regular way so he might have thought this would be different and/or exciting. Just tell him that you do not like it and do not want him to do that again. Communication is very important between you two.

Run don't walk away from this freak.I am non judgemental but thta's life threatening.That's ok I had some guy turn me around and enter from the rear .My vagina not anus.But it hurt and I stopped him,he got pisses and I won't see him

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