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Give Advice: Am I being used by my ex?

Published on January 26, 2011 by pinksakura

My ex broke up with me a couple of days before Thanksgiving, and for the past month we have been spending time together and sleeping together. He even took me out for my birthday. We kiss and hug and sometimes say I love you, but as far as I know we aren't boyfriend and girlfriend. One day I asked him if he was still in love with me, and he said "No comment." He said that he gave that answer because, "You get emotional." He says he cares about me a lot. I feel like he may still be in love with me but he is pretending to not want to be in a relationship. I just don't know. Am I being used? What are we if we're not boyfriend and girlfriend?


Yes, you are being used. He is having sex with you without being in a commited relationship. It's irrelevant whether or not you love or care for him. He doesn't have the same life goals as you. Move on and find someone who wants to build a life with you. Aren't you worthy of that?

Why does he have all the control say in the relationship? What is it You want? He broke up with you yet you ran back to him & jumped back in bed with him? Have you ever heard the expression "why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?"

I care about my grandmother but I don't want to be in a relationship with her. Why do you want to be with this guy? Does he give you what you need to be in a happy & fulfilling relationship or does he just fill a void in your life.

I suggest you get clear on what it is you want/need from a guy. And once you do decide if this guy has those qualities and characteristics. Although if you re-read your e-mail you'll probably find your answer.

Good Luck!

Read He's Just Not That Into You by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo. If you still don't believe that then ask the experts on YourTango. They will all confirm that not only are you being used but that he's just not that into you.

Hey Pink! Just thot I would give you a guys perspective on this situation. HOW CONVENIENT!!!!!!!! Sorry, I know it's crass, to say the least, but it's true! I would venture to say a very strong majority of men dream of such a one sided, selfish affair! Get what you want with no strings attached! You need to move on girl and find yourself. No one, I repeat, no one is worth compromising your integrity and self worth, and you should never give anyone that much control! Godspeed and many Blessings be as you move on to greater and higher living!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He broke up with you. He's still getting sex with you. You are still saying,''I loveyou'', but he doesn't want to tell you a truth you don't want to hear. Get some self- esteem and a different boyfriend. This one either already has someone or is on the look-out for your replacement. Do you want to go through that? Get out of that bad relationship before he hands you a worse one to live through. That's next!