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during our "trial seperation", should i be okay with my husband living with a woman knowing that she has loved him for 6 years?

Published on April 30, 2009 by coco

My husband and I were on the verge of a divorce. He chose to not divorce me and ended up telling me he wants things to work out but there is a lot of thinking and evaluating he needs to do. In the mean time, he is living with a girl who was a friend... except she has loved him for over 6 years and he knows this. She constantly updates that she feels "loved" and is "so lucky to have you" on her social networking site. My husband doesn't help the situation because he feels he is to act like himself and if she takes things the wrong way it is her problem. This includes sending pics of himself saying "i miss you" when away from her and allowing her to take pics of the two of them on her phone.

ANSWERS

I think you need to talk to him. If you aren't going to counseling, it would be a good idea. I don't think the way he is behaving with this girlfriend sounds completely innocent. I think if he wants things to work out between the two of you, he should avoid situations like that. Is there some other friend he can stay with?

It doesn't sound like his heart is with you if he's living with another woman. You guys either need to go in for some counseling or recognize that its over. His words say reconcile, but his actions are saying divorce.

Your husband is just trying to let you off easy. I don't know what your relationship like in the past or what kind of person you are. But it is very obvious that he trying to slide out of your marriage without hurting your feelings or being hurt himself. Often times situations like that occure in families where wives have a tendency to be dramatic, create a scene, be vengeful or emotionally fragile. So he wants to have this new life with his girlfriend, but doesn't want to have drama. I think you are protecting yourself from heartache and thus believe his lies. Look at it through as a observer, as if you were not in a middle of it, and everything will become crystal clear to you.

1l2 of your story sounds like what i went through except the part with him living with another women- That is really disrespectful--- What the lady said in your first responce is comletley true he is weaseling his way out -- REMEMBER (actions speak louder than words) ---- He is enjoying having you waiting in the winds while he sows some wild oats--- I do believe you should Live your Life--- find things you like to do, travel, hang out with friends -- dont let him get the better of you.. .

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