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Best male friend

Published on May 2, 2012 by lonna82

I have know this guy for almost 3 years.  We have always been friends but late last year he was making comments like maybe he wanted more.  So, he came on to me one night and I said no i didn't think we should have sex but I was open and liking it.  So, we still stayed good friends like always.  I made it clear that I don't do friends with benefits or one night stands and if anything were to happen he would have to know that I could develop feelings for him.  He said he had thought of all possibilites.  But, I didn't go through with it because I wasn't convinced it was more than sex.  So, a few months later oiur chemistry has just boomed and we have been together a few times and increasing.  He took me to a friends house to hang out although we originally were going out.  I thought that was a good sign.  It is a little complicated, but I feel like he is giving me signs that it is or could be more.  I had mentioned the other day about something we were joking about and said I don't want to bother you and he said "bother like this is a bother?" and then said I though I was bothering you and I said no absolutely not.  I like it.  And he said yeah?  ANd I said yes and said you can bother me anytime!  haha  And he said oh I can do that you better mean that or something like that, but in a funny manner and we laughed.  I feel like it is more, don't want to ask yet because things are just evolving.  

ANSWERS

If this "evolves", you will gain a lover, and lose a friend. Too, you are encouraging him to "hit" on you with the flirting. The decision is yours, of course, but if it is "just sex", you will lose a good friend.

With the marriage rate declining so much in America over the past 40 years, you are right to be asking questions. You sound like the "marrying" type. The big questions are:

Is he the marrying type? And if so, does he want to marry you?

So you have a choice. You can ask directly or you can be subtle. (I always prefer the subtle way, but that's just me.)

If you are both over 23 (the age when divorce is a lot less likely) and you've gotten your college degree (another trait that correlates with high marriage and low divorce rates), then perhaps you should find out.

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