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Am I really being too picky?

Published on April 18, 2013 by thelobo

Here is the situation that I am in; I haven't been in a relationship for 5 years, or laid for 3, YIKES!!!

All in all, I'm ok with that, I have enjoyed being single, it has allowed me opportunities that I wouldn't have otherwise had should I need to consider the needs of the other person as well.

But.... I feel that it's time. Time to end the dry spell, time to find someone who I can have a strong companionship with, time to feel a little more adult.

I'm 24, male, college educated, attractive, pretty outgoing, funny, witty, and intelligent. These things I know, and am told by friends. But for the life of me I can find no one who interests me.

So my question is, am I being too picky? I have high standards, sure. But I'm not all that focused on looks, if you know what I mean. I'm looking more of an intellectual connection that I just can't seem to find anywhere.

As for ending the dry spell. My friends all suggest "Slaying the dragon before I get my princess". While it's a decent thought on how to get my groove back, the "dragons" that my friends have attempted to set me up with just feel like too far of a compromise of my integrity. Not that they aren't nice, but no attraction in anyway shape or form just feels like I would be compromising my integrity too much. I should at least feel good about what I have done, right?

Anyways, let me know your thoughts, I'm really interested in outside perspectives.


Maybe it's just a poor choice of words on your part, but you ARE coming across as rather arrogant to me. That could be the problem.

Are you going into the clergy or have a religious background? The words you used suggest that you "compromising your integrity" and used the word picky which are to different oxymoron's. I believe you are rejecting people and its intentional and deliberate. for whatever reason you decide not to see anything attractive in Females or Males based on your views that is up to you. If you are being set aside by God for a greater calling then only you can define that and feel secure with your decision to abstain from what you feel is behavior unbecoming.In general I have met some very negative people in my life by PRACTICE I learned to see the best in individuals. I am shy when it comes to females, and usually a friend has to tell me a female is trying to get at me because the ones I want tend to ignore me. Yet my confidence usually wins females over because I don't try to esteem myself INTELLIGENT or haughty and/or pride myself on being perfect. If you lack desire and your confidence has been shunted by past experiences then that's different. I suggest a physical and to tell the doctors about your moods, there could be an imbalance. I think you would have to constantly check your own stinking thinking as to whether your being critical of people and then hiding behind the picky thing when your really being an asshole or acting stuck up. anyone who walks around finding something wrong with everyone has some serious character defects and I applaud you for being honest , but there should be some spiritual concerns. whatever you put out in the universe indeed will come back to you, if you purposely set out to find no good in anyone and you can't find anything attractive then that means your quite unhappy and the loneliness is signifying something may not be right. We all have things we want to change about our selves and I just can't imagine no sex for a month let alone years

I didn't write in error "males or Females" either, because typically gay men use the "I'm picky" thing and then claim its the other person (females being unattractive) when they really mean its them who are not into females but scared to tell their friends they may be bisexual or gay. When you also wrote "I can find NO ONE who interest me" may signify a dual meaning, pardon me if its not. There is a male herb Yohimbe bark that you can take for male lack of drive. They do have Yohimbe in mens health vitamins and it helps bring the natural passion of wanting to get laid good luck