Asked by Samantha McCleery on
Relationship
How can i start trusting my relationship, my partner has lied to me so many times and sometimes it just hard to trust him. We have a baby together and i dont want her to see us fighting all the time, i love him to bits and cant stand seeing him with another girl, we are both very jelious and prosecive, so we just keep ourselvies to ourselvies as it starts fights..i really need help before i lose him for good. sorry that spelling its good.
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Sex is a barometer for how relationships are going. If you are having trust issues with your husband, you are likely angry and suppressing that anger because you feel guilty about not having sex. If he is cheating on you with another woman, you have a right to be angry, because he is the father of your child. You two must have some honest vulnerable conversation about what is going on in your relationship. You could benefit from having a coach that can take you through a withhold session where you can tell each other the truth. I would suspect if he is cheating on you that your lack of interest in sex is more related to that than it is to the fact that you have had a baby. Having a child can suppress your libido for a short time but if your spouse is supporting and loving to you during that time and not cheating and watching porn, your desire is much more likely to return. Get some help.
Do you really love him (that person that lied you so many times), or the person that you THINK he is? It seems that you want so much to be in that relationship, that you forget to stand up for yourself. If you continue this way, what message do you give (indirectly) to him and your child? (that you don't deserve something better? that you can "step on" any time?)
Be honest with yourself, value yourself and respect yourself. No one should treat you badly...this is not healthy, real love.
Love yourself enought to say this is not good enough.