Asked by redbreast on
Is it ok to seek revenge against your ex?
My boyfriend and I broke up about 3 months ago...he was cheating for the past 2 years of our 4 year relationship..I feel like I am dealing with it a lot better now. Almost like I am at peace now...but when I see him..and I see him a lot..we have a baby together...I stil feel anger sometimes..and I would love to get some kind of revenge against him..not sure what..but I just feel like he got away with lying and lying and lying to me...and cheating and cheating..and here I am hurting from it...and he gets nothing..besides freedom now to do whatever he wants...it pisses me off...I am usually not a vengeful person at all..but I would love to see him squirm a bit. Am I wrong?
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i know this is probably hard to hear...but you just gotta let him go, be frends with him and just move on......that way you will not feel so bad and bitter......when you let someone who hurt you go, you are actually helping yourself....trust em you'll feel so much better and live with peace in ur heart!!!!
fr3ky!
It's totally understandable that you are angry at him about the situation but even if someone's hurt you very badly, revenge isn't the answer. It honesty won't change anything. What you can do though is stick him with child support which he is legally responsible for anyway. Make sure that you get legal documentation. In reality he doesn't get the freedom to do whatever he wants because he still has a legal financial responsibility to his child. Definitely study up on child support laws. If he tries to get out of paying, take him to court. His paychecks can be automatically docked and he won't be entitled to his tax return if he owes back pay. But do not, under any circumstances, DO NOT use your child as a revenge tool against him. It will end up hurting your kid in the long run. He will have visitation rights and if he wants to see his child you should let him do that. Even though you don't like him, your kid has a right to have a relationship with his/her father.
It's an understandable emotion. But if you want to exact revenge in order to make him squirm, you might be sorely disappointed. Revenge has a way of backfiring and making you look like the crazy one. For now, I would recommend just dealing with your emotions in a healthy way and taking care of your child. And if necessary, start taking some kickboxing classes to burn off that aggression.