Asked by BigSkyJewel on
It very rarely happens...
Hi, I'll admit I'm kinda shy about asking this. But I have only ever been with my husband(everyone gasp) and I love him dearly, but I have a problem. I have only truly "gotten off" a handful of times. We've been married for almost 3 years now. My husband has been with others before he met me and never had this problem before. Is there something I'm doing wrong? I mean I do enjoy it but from my understanding of having a "O" I'm NOT having one. Any advice?
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I think you need to start exploring yourself on your own and finding out what you like. What feels good to you? Discover what it is and what you like, then show him how to do that too.
Really, for women, if you want to orgasm, you need to take control. Stimulate yourself. Research some new positions that might be better for you.
Also, if you are young, it might not be happening all the time. Sex gets better as you get older and more comfortable with your body and more comfortable with asking for what you want. But you can't just assume your husband will know what to do and then do it. You need to discover for yourself what you like, what stimulates and arouses you and then let him in on those things.
I really don't think most women orgasm during sex without some other form of stimulation. So, relax and have fun.
I have heard that it's pretty common for women not to orgasm during sex (men don't really tend to have this problem). These types of women enjoy oral more because it gets them off. Not sure if you are one of these people but if oral works for you, maybe you should stick to that. Also, I think it gets easier as you get older too, but I'm not sure how old you are now. However, from my personal experience I've realized that sometimes it can just be a compatibility issue. I was never able to with my first partner (and I mean like 1 time in a 3 year period). After that relationship ended, I was able to with my next partner some of the time. With my current partner I am able to almost every single time. You should try to work with your husband to see if there's something you can do to get it to work. Maybe try to stimulate yourself during sex by rubbing your clit. I hope you are able to work something out.