Asked by gbaby4lyfe on
HOW DO I HANDLE A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP WHEN I HAVE NEVER HAD ONE
I LIVE IN BALIMTORE, MD N MY BF NOW LIVES IN IOWA.
WE MET IN SCHOOL HERE IN BALTIMORE N THEN HE GRADUATED N WAS ABLE TO LEAVE HE N HE WAS SUPPOSED TO COME DOWN HERE THIS WEEKEND CAUSE OF COURSE ITS VALENTINES DAY BUT WE HAVE SO MUCH SNOW HERE THAT ITS NOT SAFE.
I NEED TO KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT CAUSE I MISS HIM LIKE CRAZY EVERYDAY N ITS HARD CAUSSE IM USED TO BEIN ABLE TO SLEEP NEXT TO MY BF N TO SEE HIM WHEN I WANT N I CANT
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Every long distance relationship comes down to three things: Trust, Commitment, and Willingness. Hopefully in the time you were together you learned enough about each other to trust each other. Ideally, you had a detailed, in depth, and mutually understood conversation prior to his departure about how you would handle the distance, and what it would mean to both of you. Lastly, are you both willing to deal with the distance as far as keeping plans to travel to see each other and to stay true while apart.
However, in my opinion, what it really comes down to is plans for the future. Do you plan on moving there? Does he plan on moving back? If so, it the plan congruent with both of your goals?
Other than that, scheduled phone calls and web cam dates can help keep each other as priorities and keep communication open.
Best of luck.
It's a tough situation but if you're both committed you'll work through it. Why did he leave? Is it temporary or permanent? Long distance relationships will survive but only with strong commitment and plans for the future. At some point the distance thing will have to end in either you moving to be with him or him moving to be with you. Or if it's temporary, then you know when you'll be back together again. Keep that date in mind and just keep talking every day. Write, email, ichat, call each other. You're already planning weekend trips to see each other so I think you've already got a pretty good flow on how to deal with the LDR.