Asked by bk_cogent on
When should I start worrying about marriage?
I have been with my guy for 3 years. I am 18, he is 21.
When should I start thinking about marriage? With him or someone elsE?
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We agree using the word "worrying" in your question indicates you are not ready for marriage yet. When you are ready you will both know. "Marry Yourself First" is a book by Ken Donaldson. It's a great read and can be very helpful in making this decision. We highly recommend it.
me and my boyfriend are going on 4 years with a child and where both gunna be 20 this year and honstley were not gunna get married for a while cause we have both said cause you never know what is gunna happen along the way right know were both still really young and we could find some body different and plus u really wanna finnish school and get a good job and of course be able to afford a wedding! I would really wait for a while! ur only 18 and he is 21 thats could end up to be a big different as time goes on! and for all u know he could hit a i wanna settle down mode and u just getting into the party scene then what is going to happen? break up! so wait! but in the end it is all up to u to really deicided! so good luck i said what i had to say!
i'd say when you're both comfortable in your careers and have saved up some money.
If you're ready to get married, 18 seems a bit young in my opinion. Then start thinking about if when you feel the need to do so. While you're thinking about your romantic future, also think about your personal future. Decide what career plans that you may want to have, and what goals you may want to reach for yourself. Good luck to you, marriage is a big step, and you should think about it.
I think the fact that you use the word "worrying" when thinking about the question of marriage is a surefire sign that you aren't ready to even be thinking about it yet. Marriage shouldn't be something to be worried or stressed about, especially at your age. Just because you've been with someone for a long time doesn't immediately mean that you should get married. When the time is right you both will feel it and thinks will fall into place the way they're meant to. You can't force anything to happen. Enjoy dating and being with your boyfriend. 3 years into a relationship is a long time, but at your age it can be somewhat limiting. The fact that you question if you should think about marriage "with him or someone else" suggests that you aren't seriously thinking about your boyfriend long term or you aren't sure if he's the one you want to be with for the rest of your life. You're young, take your time. You should probably date around more to figure out what you want from a relationship and what it means to you. You aren't going to know what's right for you until you have enough life experiences. And do you really think it's a good idea to think about marriage now, when you're 18. You're not even legally old enough to consume alcohol. You got plenty of time. The average age for women to start marrying/settling down is 25-26. And just remember marriage means FOREVER. It's not something that should be thought about lightly. It's about committing to another person for the rest of your life.