Asked by Sickofgames on
ASK YOURTANGO
Got a question about love, dating, marriage, divorce, makeups or breakups? Ask our members, because experience is an invaluable teacher.
Sponsored Content - Stories Across the Web
Got a question about love, dating, marriage, divorce, makeups or breakups? Ask our members, because experience is an invaluable teacher.
Asked by Sickofgames on
Post new comment
Because they don't want the confrontation. When a man is no longer interested he's done. He doesn't care how long he's been with you, what he said, has done or promised you or who it hurts. As long as he can disappear and not be questioned, it's all good.
Usually, these types are hot and heavy really fast, then they disappear as fast as they came in. Sometimes though, you actually do a have relationship, but again it's about cowardice. And in today's society we chalk it up to "he's just not that into you". The most over-used BS line ever created to justify lies, cowardice and bad behavior.
Ruffian - you are so spot on about "he's just not that into you" is an over-use term to explain guys or break ups.
I think the old saying "men need cave time" is true. While they are in the cave, be confident, hold the space, create mystery and fun, hang with your friends and if it takes him too long to process, find a faster one. The pace has to match... however, that said... women need to give "growth" time to happen.
If you plant a garden and keep pulling up everything wondering if it is really growing while out of site, you won't have much of a garden.
Be sure to ask, "what seeds am I planting?", "am I getting the results I want?", perhaps its time to start with different seeds to get a different harvest of --". It is all about results. Summary: Patients within reason. p.s. Don't treat him like one of your girl friends!
If a guy goes what I call MIA, he's probably just that not that into you or just maybe more into himself. It's selfish and inconsiderate. I say if you haven't heard from him move on with your life. I've been through this on several occasions. Got one that keeps coming back despite the fact that I keep telling him it irks me he keeps doing it. I told him to keep it moving, but apparently he can't stay and can't stay away. I wish he would pick a side and roll with it.
Possibilities: Either you are the problem, the guys are the problem or its a natural thing that occurs from time to time and you should be patient.
ALL men cannot be the problem. I'm a good guy and I don't JUST disappear on women. I ALL the men are behaving this way maybe you should look into how you choose your men.
If this happens from time to time, its natural because it won't work out with every guy you meet.
If this happens all the time then you maybe doing something that sends men running for the hills.... it may be that you have bridal magazines on the coffee table (happened to me once)
www.stuff-about.com
i can't answer this as im going threw the same thing . i have bin dating this guy for 6 mounths but now his ex is whanting full custedy on his kids now i have not seen him in 4 mouths and the last time italked to him was back in jan. he told me then that he defently whanted tosee me but know i do not know have not talked to him since.
They don't.
Some guys do. Not all guys. I think it's important to open up to the possibility that there are good guys out there, because there are.
Maybe you don't have proof of that in your life personally. However, if you look at other people's lives you will find proof that there are good guys out there who do stick around. Once you start focusing on that positive proof, new possibilities will open up for you.
I can relate. Just recently two sweet guys, one at a time, were so into me then poof. Disappeared. I made one more contact and then let go. It is O.K. I see all of the above could be true. I know for sure each of them were not ready to handle me. I had lots to give. Each of them were falling for me. I had my boundaries. I had my own life. I am my own person. I still showed them each so much unconditional love, all they disclosed to me not a problem. The truth of the matter is not always you. How ready are they? I am so balanced. They were in a situation is they lacked what they needed to make it work so, the greatest act of love a guy can give a girl is to let go. I cherish the memories of what they gave me in the short time we were together. I smile today at the good times we had. But there is no jello in my hand.
He doesn't like you that much and he's afraid of how you'll react.
It could be a number of things, To my knowledge us guys want to see who has the upper hand. We want to see if your thinking about us, going to contact us and see how long is takes for you to do so. Me personally have never tried it because i think its kinda cruel, but its basically a test like mentioned in the other comments.
I think guys disappear because they need time to settle their life first and then they decide if dating a woman is best for them.
guys can love as perfectly as you girls. the only difference is that you hook at the guys even when you two know it's over. let's get AJCBSN for example: maybe even she knew it was over with his guy but even so she kept trying to hold this relationship... i'm not sure if you're getting my point, but guys are able to love as much as you girls. and you don't need to treat us as "Jell-Os" because we may like being squeezed by you girl if we truly love you ^^.. but it we don't, we're ending up this..........forgive me if i wrote anything wrong, i'm bazilian
I think guys are trying to test us, it's all about who's got the upper hand. If they go on distance and we react with questions like "why didn't you call me? where have you been?" etc. .. they know exactly where they've got us. If we don't react that way and go on distance ourselves, they are turned on much more, because we got our own lives and they don't know what we did in that time. It keeps the mystery around us.
I have been wondering the same thing myself. recently been with an old boyfriend, which has been incredible. But after about 3 weeks he suddenly backed off. He said he didnt want a serious relationship, which I never asked for, He has only been divorced for about 4 months. I can relate to this, I myself have been divorced as well. But none the less this one really hurt only because in such a short time with him I really started feeling and caring for this man. I left it alone for a week or so, crying LOL. But just went out with him again this weekend, had a great time, asked no questions, and he again just explained that he is unsure what he is doing, he rushes things, and doesnt want to date a bunch of girls and hasnt been with anyone since we were together. I really think he might be scared and if thats true he doesnt need me confessing my feelings to add more confusion. I hope to hear from him again, but only if he is sure thats what he wants. Good Luck...
As per the title of the book - He's Just Not That Into You. Seriously. When a man is crazy head-over-heels in love with a woman, nothing, but nothing will keep him away.
Want to have a good relationship with a man? Then treat him like Jell-O in the hand. How do you treat Jell-O in your hand? What happens when you squeeze it too tight? What happens when you tip you hand? What happens if you shake it too hard? These actions will lose your Jell-O, and, metophorically lose your man.
becaues there like that sweetie its hard to.i thought after i truned 15 it would be all good but nope it wasnt.lol song of the day artist:shinedown song:if you only knew
well sometimes when they do this its because they may have feelings for u and are afraid of being hurt again, if they were hurt before. alot guys don't know how to deal with their emotions so they isolate themselves alot to get past it. or another reason they may have someone and just might be using you as a rebound. but a majority of the time they are learning how to deal with their emotions.
guys pull the disappearing act for a lot of reason. 1.They have a next woman 2. There not that into u or 3. It's a guy thing or something more.