Asked by Leigh on
How do I request something delicate, without making her VERY mad?
My Girlfriend & I are in an open relationship. I love her a lot, she is smart, kind & beautiful. Even though I don't mind her having other relationships, I dislike hearing about them.
Unfortunately she was starved for attention for a VERY long time & verbally/emotionally abused for most of her adult life. She wants to show off for people & show me how desirable she is. She wants EVERYONE to love her. In short, she tells me about everything.... EVERYTHING.
I do NOT want her to feel reigned-in. I do want her to have her fun & feel loved as she wants so much....
How do I ask her to stop telling me about it without making her feel like I am being jealous or want her to stop all together?
Should I just suffer in silence?
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As a woman, if I were in this situation, I would probably take it best if my b/f said something along the lines of "I want you to feel all the love possible. I'm happy that you get the attention that makes you feel good about yourself, but hearing about it does damage my self esteem a little. I love you too much to hear the details. I'm sorry but I have to ask that you stop telling me the details". Make sure to do it in a very casual way or it will feel more serious then it is. Good luck!
Being a little jealous isnt bad, however if when she tells you about these other relationships is she giving unnessarry details? "He/She said they wanted to do this to me" " They said i was so this" if thats the case then it might be that she is actually trying to make you jealous to get a reaction, you can try talking to her about it and say "When you tell me stuff like that it makes me uncomfortable" if she respects you enough she will apologize and keep the opinions of others to herself.