2. IT’S ALWAYS BETTER TO TAKE THE HIGH ROAD
Not every relationship succeeds. For most daters, breakups are inevitable bumps in the road on the path to finding lasting love. When your relationship ends – or worse, when you are unceremoniously dumped by someone you really care about – as painful as it is, it’s always better to refrain from nasty remarks, insults, and dragging anyone else into the drama.
In addition to being left for another woman, Jennifer Aniston has also faced the humiliation of John Mayer discussing their breakup with the media. Ugh. Take a cue from something she has always done right: take the high road and keep your mouth closed. Of course you should allow yourself to have your feelings of sadness and anger. But work through them in private or with close friends. You don’t “get” closure from someone else; you find true closure through processing an experience emotionally.
3. IT CAN BE DANGEROUS TO HAVE A “TYPE”
Vince Vaughn, Paul Sculfor, John Mayer, Gerard Butler, John Mayer. It seems that Jennifer Aniston likes “players.” Did I mention John Mayer? While it’s good to be clear on what you want in a mate, falling into the pattern of dating one kind of person can be detrimental to your love life. Especially if you’re not having success with your preferred “type,” challenge yourself to date a little out of your comfort zone. If, like Jen, bad boys are your flavor, you may be surprised to learn that the kind, non-commitmentphobe you never originally would have considered might just be perfect for you.
4. YA GOTTA HAVE FRIENDS
When it comes to tabloids, you can never be sure what to believe. Some stories claim that a pattern of needy behavior is to blame for the demise of Jennifer Aniston’s romantic relationships. And, certainly, nothing kills a relationship quicker than clinginess. But one thing Jen is definitely doing right: she’s got a great group of girlfriends and spends lots of quality time with them.
One of the most common mistakes people make in relationships is to make their lover the center of their life. When you spend all of your free time with your partner, you’re bound to make him/her feel claustrophobic, and eventually your relationship will suffocate. Maintaining close relationships with friends as a part of a full and satisfying life will make you irresistibly attractive to your significant other. When you respect the fact that no one person can possibly meet every one of your needs, you take the pressure off your partner, which makes the time you do spend together a lot more enjoyable.
5. YOU CAN’T CHANGE ANYONE ELSE.
Hollywood rumor has it that the on-again, off-again relationship between Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer is on again. In my humble opinion as a dating coach, this is not a great decision. Not only has the commitment-phobic playboy broken his share of hearts, Mr. Mayer has also made a habit of mouthing off to the press about the demise of his relationships. If it is true that Jennifer wants to settle down, get married and start a family, John Mayer probably isn’t the right guy for her. And there’s nothing she can do to change him. Albert Einstein once said “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”The lesson here: Look at your relationship. If all you see is a field of red flags, STOP THE INSANITY. Stop trying to change your partner and instead change your circumstances. Move on to someone who deserves a friend like you.