Dear Dr. Reece,
Okay, smartie, what did the people in Oklahoma do to deserve the tornado disasters?
I never claimed to be a "smartie" and these questions humble me. There is no answer to the 'why?' here although we all certainly would like one. As far as I can tell, these were just normal folks, going through their normal lives when - bam - the abnormal happened. Full moon? Nope. Friday the 13th? Nope. Bad dental habits? Well, it was Oklahoma....joke!
The truth is there is no answer save that some times shit happens. When it does, what you do with it is a big part of how big the impact affects you.
When a bad thing happens in our lives, depression is an automatic response. It's the automatic responses in life that we do have power over, though. Yes, it sucks. And, we are all allowed to just sit there for a while and feel sorry for ourselves. However, nothing is going to happen until you break out of the victim role and begin to look at little things that you can control.
Here is a few things that one of the survivors I talked with decided to "get busy and get after":
Contact Red Cross to ascertain help options.
Alert family and friends they were okay.
Ask for a month extension on all bills to free up emergency money. Yes, almost every creditor will respond to a phone call or letter in a case of emergency.
Call their state representative (www.oklahoma.gov) to get information on acceptance.
Notify their church of their needs and ask a love offering be taken.
All of these put the power in the "victims" hands. And, it turns a victim int a victor. So, bad things do happen, but what you do with them, how you ACT and not REACT makes all the differences.
Think about donating to a charity serving those in the Oklahoma Tornado Disasters.
Ask Dr. Reece is a service of Reece W. Manley, DD, M.Ed., MPM, a spirituality expert and progressive Christian author who is also an out and proud member of the GLBT community. Persons needing advice are encouraged to write to firstname.lastname@example.org or visit http://www.pridecoach.net.