Sweet smirking Jesus, according to People [1], Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson are engaged… to be married… to each other. Before we get too carried away, this engagement [2] rumor has happened before, so we're going to slow our roll a little. And before that, we heard that ScarJo [3] was telling Reynolds to take it slow [4]. Hmm.

People (typically a reliable source because of their squeamishness about lawsuits) said that Double R gave her a very nice ring (though probably not the $2.5 million shine that Nick Cannon [5] gave Selita Ebanks Mariah Carey) that she can't wait to show off tonight. An engagement ring sounds sort of like incontrovertible evidence. We’re not sure what's more of a sign that you've made it in Hollywood, starring in a blockbuster movie or getting engaged to an A-list starlet? Or does one always lead to the other? Definitely, Maybe [6] was a nice romantic comedy and proved that Reynolds can succeed without being the over-the-top center-of-attention. Which bodes well for any relationship involving 2 big stars. This has got to be a kick in the crotch for ScarJo's would be muse-monger, Woody Allen. In a lot of ways, Double R is the anti Woody Allen: tall, bearded, traditionally handsome, ripped, blondish (at least from a disposition standpoint), and funny because of his awesomeness rather than narcissistic self-deprecation. Maybe Sue Johanson would be more his speed.

Then again, we’re not sure if a relationship can make it when both parties are so much prettier than the general populace. And Alanis Morissette [7] has yet to weigh in with a blessing song, a revenge song, or a reconciliation song, so let's not count this as a done deal.