Talking to a date - How does your choice of words promote or defeat romance and love?
What if you could change the mood and health of a dating or long-term relationship by the words you use to describe it?
You can–if you expand on the logic and findings in a recent linguistic study by Doctors Peter S. Dodds and Christopher M. Danforth at the University of Vermont.
The New York Times reported that this pair of Vermont statisticians analyzed song lyrics, speeches and blog content to evaluate our mass psychology and national well being.
They studied 232,574 songs written by 20,025 artists between 1960 and 2007.
Learn how to hear your lover’s words and sounds in ways that enhance arousal and enjoyment
You’re probably aware that there are a host of articles, blogs and books on hot, sexy ways to turn on your lover with words and voice tone, including my own recent YourTango articles; “The Power of Pillow Talk” and "4 Quick Tips for a Sexier Voice". However, the other side of this equation is rarely addressed: the role of the listener.
When it comes to getting frisky between the sheets, do you spice up the action by letting some naughty words slip out? If not, you may want to join the legions of Americans who are using dirty talk to mix things up in the bedroom.
How to know if he's a keeper. When the pillow talk starts. Chubby men last longer in bed. Ten kooky sex facts. Ten obscure marriage laws. Most Americans believe in soul mates. How to get over fear of losing a virginity. First date action. What is a boyfriender? The science of getting what you want. And a great ethnicity study from OK Cupid.
I am well aware that this predilection elicits a giant "ewwww" from most of the sex-having population, but I have always liked a little "daddy talk" in the bedroom. No, I don't want to have sex with MY father, but using the word, loaded as it is with connotations of power and taboo, gets me unapologetically hot.
Dying to know your lover's secrets? Then spark up this conversation.
It's definitely not the type of light and airy chat you want to strike up on your first starry-eyed date. Let's be honest: Dredging up the past and owning all things that went right and wrong can be about as pleasant as having a root canal. But precisely because spilling the beans requires such a high level of comfort and trust, a Q&A session (topic: all things past) with your guy can bring the two of you closer in your relationship.