You know Archie? The old fashioned comic about what kids were like back in the '60s, and it seems like it was probably kind of nerdy even for back then? Yeah, that Archie. You've probably never read it, but you know what it is. Well, next year, Archie is getting a sexy reboot, as a modern teen with modern friends dealing with modern things like iPods and internets and North Korean terrorists and Osama bin Laden's ghost haunting ALL OF AMERICA! (Almost none of that is confirmed, it's just what I'm assuming the new series will be about.
Miley Cyrus was quietly dating Patrick Schwarzenegger for months, but only recently went public with their romance: The pair were spotted making out last month at a USC game, and the couple kept the sexy party going at Art Basel in Miami last week. And by "party," we do mean party: Cyrus and Schwarzenegger were spotted boozing, glassy eyed and smoking what looked an awful lot like marijuana throughout the festival. And guess who wasn't thrilled with that? That's right: Patrick Schwarzenegger's blue-blooded, Kennedy-bred mother, Maria Shriver.
Barbara Walters just named the brilliant and beautiful Amal Clooney the Most Fascinating Person of the Year. (We're sure her handsome husband George Clooney agrees) The two recently tied the knot in Venice, Italy. Swoon! The famously secretive couple had all of Hollywood gushing over their nuptuals (and we were, too!).
One of the things that the recent hack of Sony Movies' private information revealed is that there are a lot of jerks working behind the scenes in Hollywood. Reading emails where people insulted actors and movies, whined about themselves, and yelled at other people was entertaining, but it was also pretty embarrassing for everyone involved. There was just a lot of negativity flying around.
It was recently announced that Cuba Gooding, Jr. has been cast as OJ Simpson in a miniseries by Ryan Murphy. Sarah Paulson is going to star as prosecutor Marcia Clark, and that the series is going to be like American Horror Story, except with true crimes instead of fictionalized horror. So, you know, super sleazy.
Throughout the past nine seasons, the "It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia" gang has landed in some pretty hilarious situations in Paddy’s Pub and the rest of South Philly. Seriously, we're not kidding; each episode is filled with ridiculously funny quotes that will have you rolling on the floor in tears. One thing you can always expect from the show is random interactions between all of the characters. Everyone in this gang certainly has an interesting relationship with one another.
Eleven years ago we were just sitting around watching Christmas Vacation and A Christmas Story (not that those are bad), but then something magical happened. You could call it the Christmas miracle of 2003. Elf hit theaters and your life has never been the same. Forget the fact that it doesn't even need to be Christmas for you to sit down and sing along with Buddy the Elf and Zooey Deschanel.
Even for people who don't celebrate Christmas, Bob Clark's A Christmas Story has become one of the most famous holiday movies of all time. Every Christmas, TBS brings us a full 24-hours of Ralphie and his quest for a Red Ryder BB Gun. If you haven't seen A Christmas Story yet, do yourself a favor and finally watch it this year because it's a classic and every single human being should see the film at least once.
If you haven't been following the Sony Pictures leak, you really should be. It's been very entertaining. Basically, some hacker group attacked the company's system and released a bunch of private information. There were upcoming movie release schedules, spreadsheets showing a bunch of movies' actual budgets and actual box office results. But definitely, by far, the most entertaining part were the private emails that were released.
The Golden Globes have been announced! They are here and we will find out the winners in January, but until then we get to write about all the people and shows we love that weren't nominated for a 2015 Golden Globe Award. Before I write about all the people who should have been nominated for a Golden Globe this year, I want to congratulate the people who were nominated because I'm sure that they all deserved it (probably), and I am aware that only five people can be nominated in each category.
Chris Brown publicly dumped his girlfriend and long-suffering love Karrueche Tran this weekend. I'd feel bad for her, but the break up means that there will be less Chris Brown in her life, so she'll probably live longer. Chris Brown commented on the breakup during a show, and then the two of them had a very public argument over social media, airing each other's dirty laundry. (And we mean dirty.) Chris Brown apologized for his actions, which is something he should have some practice with.
Does anyone remember Aaron Carter? He was the younger brother of one of the Backstreet Boys, and for a while, the music industry tried really hard to make him a thing. (If you don't know who he is, go on YouTube and look up some of his stuff. While you're watching it, try to keep in mind that Aaron Carter's career was a serious thing. They weren't messing around or trying to be silly. Those were all serious attempts.)
Rosario Dawson is a mom. That was a shocker, right? Since we never saw a baby bump! Well, reports indicate that the actress adopted a daughter earlier this fall. That's so sweet, especially since the new addition to her family is not an infant, but a 12-year-old. Sources say that the Sin City star, who was adopted herself at the age of one by her own stepfather, is family-oriented, which is sort of obvious.
Christmas music is a fun way to get into the spirit of the Christmas season as a whole (provided you don't work in retail, in which case you're probably sick of them by December 2). Christmas songs are fun to sing along with while you're wrapping gifts, decorating your tree, hanging your Christmas lights, or just chugging eggnog and rum from the carton on your couch. (Really, who are you to judge me?)
If you don't know who Nick Offerman is, then you're living your life poorly and you need to fix that. In a world of hipsters, he's bringing manliness back in the best way. He's doing it in a way that makes people that don't agree with him feel to uncomfortable to make eye contact with him. The way things are supposed to be. (Hint: Nick Offerman is a star of Parks And Recreation.)