What to do?
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What to do?

I am 40 years old. I have recently ended a 15 yr relationship, we have twin autistic boys together. The thing is that the reason why we split up was because he abused me over the years, verbally and physical. In april of last year he was drunk and got mad at me and smashed my face into a wall and choked me. So i called the police and he spent 6 months in jail for it. During that time i had met somebody else. I have feelings for him. Im like a giddy school girl when it comes to him. I smile when I think about him, when he texts me, when he calls me etc...

Is The Past Resurfacing In Your Love Relationship?
Experts Blog

Is The Past Resurfacing In Your Love Relationship?

“The snow is so beautiful,” said Lila when she sat down in my office “Yes but why are you crying?” Tears streamed down her face even as she tried to smile. Many people learn to wipe away tears and smile. Sometimes it seems that the more unhappy someone was as a child, the better she learned to do that. Put on a good face, kids are told.

After the Divorce: Surviving Seeing Your Ex for the First Time
Experts Blog

After the Divorce: Surviving Seeing Your Ex for the First Time

Your heart is pounding, it’s racing. Your mind is mush. It’s hard to think. Taking a deep breath, you try not to cry or show any emotion. There is a slight tremor in your hand. You feel like crap and are worried you look like crap. The internal dialogue goes: “Oh please dear God don’t let me cry in front of him! Breathe, just breathe. What if I start crying! I don’t want to cry! I hope he doesn’t look good. Maybe I’ll see him and feel nothing. OK, my coach said just look him in the eye and ask how his trip was. I just have to remember the words.

Men Who Wear Wigs
Experts Blog

Men Who Wear Wigs

When I was a kid I figured Nature was basically a guy thing, the same way I supposed wearing wigs, for example, was primarily a girl thing. That’s probably because when I was growing up it was men who did things like: hunt, spear, shoot, capture and in some cases kill while the females stayed let’s say, nearer to the hearth (or shopping mall).

Should You be a Coach?
Experts Blog

Should You be a Coach?

Many people find that they are coaching informally because others naturally gravitate to them for advice.  Do you enjoy motivating others and helping them to be their "best selves"?  Does working with others energize you?  Are you doing what you want to be doing in your career?  The answers to these and other questions will help to determine whether you should consider becoming a coach.

Top 5 life changing books to read in 2013
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Top 5 life changing books to read in 2013

The following was originally published in Examiner.com: Get a new perspective for 2013. It's now February but it's not too late to start changing your mind towards a healthier mindset. Just like exercise, how you perceive and think about the world can affect your sense of well-being. Here are some titles to get started:

5 Tips To Make Your New Years Resolutions Stick
Experts Blog

5 Tips To Make Your New Years Resolutions Stick

The New Year is right around the corner and with that comes the opportunity for you to create some big changes in your life. Let’s face it, most of us make all sorts of resolutions when the New Year rolls around and most times, they never really stick. As Chicago’s resident gay dating coach, this time of year is always fairly busy for me because I have guys who really want to make changes towards finding their ultimate happiness.

What NOT to Wear on a Date
Experts Blog

What NOT to Wear on a Date

By Terri Trespicio, for GalTime.com   Could you talk a little about what to wear on a date? How important is it to be comfortable? Also, if I'm dressing up to appeal to someone else, am I kind of not being myself? I tend to look somewhat casual, but if I dress up too much than perhaps I'm sending a false picture of myself. --Jenna P., Boston, MA    

You’re Never Too Old …. To ReInvent Yourself
Experts Blog

You’re Never Too Old …. To ReInvent Yourself

I get bombarded with how I don’t want to look my age. Well, why not? And, people have always said “act your age.”  Well, why should I? I raise these points because people have pre-conceived notions of how we’re supposed to deal with aging and what we should look and act like. I invite you to throw all of those preconceptions away and hang in here with me while I advocate for change and reinvention at any age.

5 Tips For Replacing Your Ex ... Kelly Ripa Style [EXPERT]
Who will replace your ex?
Experts Blog

5 Tips For Replacing Your Ex ... Kelly Ripa Style

Ex-NFL star, Michael Strahan, will be Kelly Ripa's new Regis Philbin. Well, sort of. Just like Regis, your ex is irreplaceable. But while you won't have the exact same relationship with a new person that you had with your ex — there may be similarities or patterns that crop up. Here are 5 lessons from Kelly Ripa's process of finding a new co-host that can be applied to "replacing" your ex!

4 Bold Changes To Make In Your Marriage
Experts Blog

4 Bold Changes To Make In Your Marriage

Everyone knows that once you get married, there are certain expectations you're supposed to follow. Expectations that make men feel like they have signed their lives away, and make women think that they'll never have to worry about being betrayed or alone. Once you're married there are "rules" such as, "You can't cheat.", "You can't flirt.", "You must love and be attracted only to your partner."  What most people don't realize is that following those rules goes against the grain of our human experience.