What can you learn from a bad boyfriend? Turns out, a whole lot!
Women who get played by men aren't "dumb" or "inexperienced". Smart women get played all the time … and not because the guy is bright or smooth, but because his bullsh*t story has enough tangible possibility for it to be believable. Moreover, these "players" aren't useless men. They watch and wait — predators of a sort — and fill a specific need that a woman is looking for. And not just any need, but a core need she wants filled: sex, affection, security, attention, freedom, romance, etc.
I was incautiously smitten, planning for a date that was never going to happen. Mr. Online Charmer abruptly cancelled our dinner, feigning a funeral he suddenly had to attend. He promised to reschedule and then disappeared into the virtual abyss with all my other Mr. Wrongs.
Our favorite glasses wearing, junk food loving, nerd-chic heroine has officially taken her bow. And after seven years of laughs, what better way to pay tribute to the comic 30 Rock series than to take a trip down Liz Lemon’s romantic memory lane. The show paved the way for some new funny girl’s like Zooey Dechanel’s quirky Jess and Mindy Kalling’s adorably disheveled Mindy. So in Tina Fey’s immortal words, “Ain’t no party like a Liz Lemon party cause a Liz Lemon party is mandatory.”
Once you’ve done your research about how to get a guy, it’s common to want to put all that you’ve learned in action. However, you must be careful! Below are three types of guys that you should stay clear of while in the dating scene. Sadly, these types of men are often glamorized; making them seem like viable options, but they should be avoided.
Believe me, I understand having a fetish for bad boys. We've all entertained certain fantasies after seeing a particularly rousing episode of Prison Break. What woman wouldn't want to spend a night with a tattooed alpha male who looks like he's been carved out of stone. Can I reserve a cell for two please? But some woman take their carnal cravings for a law breaker a little more seriously. When imagination just won't cut it, they look for the real deal and seek real life inmates looking for love.
Is your relationship compass off? Do you find yourself attracting the wrong type of guy over and over again? If this sounds familiar, then your relationship compass might be in need of a calibration. Just as a compass points North due to the internal magnet that aligns itself to the natural magnetic field of the earth, your relationship compass works off of magnetic attraction – and I know you know what I mean here. You are just magnetically drawn to him – the way he looks at you, the way he talks, the way he moves.
There is a reason that people say "love is blind", but you don't have to be unaware of the signals that tell you that it's time to move on. It's really wonderful to meet a man who is attractive, gracious, and makes you laugh, isn't it? You get that warm feeling when you are with him. Conversation is easy and he's polite and attentive. You think about him when you are apart, waiting to hear from him again.
Last November after my second break up in five years, I made the grave mistake of attempting to jump right back into the dating market. Old habits die hard; I have been perpetually in relationships since the age of 16, and I am now 27. That's a long timeframe of codependency, embarassing to admit, but I've grown from the acknowledgement of my mistake. Once I was burned and ditched for his high school flame, I allowed myself to spend a weekend in a self pity party so depressing that I was close to pulling a Joseph Gordon-Levitt in 500 Days of Summe
My type, blue-collar younger guys, was not paying any dividends. So, while at Starbucks I decided to go against my better instincts and chat with a more uptown kind of guy. He joked that he was in the witness protection program. Though I wasn't sure it was right for me, we set up a date. But that was before Google informed me that he might have been joking about witness protection...
Some women have a bad habit of falling for bad boys.
Last week, I wrote about my friend Amber's breakup and I mentioned how terrible her boyfriend was. But when the relationship first started, I thought he was great. I was thrilled to see her with a man who loved her and treated her like a princess. Then, the tides turned. By the end, the best thing that could be said about her ex was that he was nice, sometimes.
At some point in a woman's life, provided she's single long enough, she'll come to know what one could call dating burnout. It's like the possibility of finding Mr. Right has cried "wolf" one too many times. She's had enough of engaging third dates that never lead to number four, months-long relationships where commitment talk is taboo and otherwise feeling like she's settling for someone against her gut instinct--just because he's there. Hopeful becomes skeptical, so that when a seemingly "good guy" comes along, warning flags abound: "uh oh, we've been here before."
First comes love, then comes marriage—as any little girl can tell you. But what if that refrain drowns out the warnings on the way to the altar? Isabel Rose recalls her deliberate march toward marriage and motherhood—and away from her own happiness.