A new poll says romance lasts just 938 days. So is familiarity good (intimacy) or bad (complacency)?
Lemondrop's Bediquette column today discusses the comfort—and horror—of familiarity. According to a new poll, romance lasts exactly two years, six months and 25 days, after which time couples stop trying and start leaving the toilet seat up (79% of men married 10+ years do this), hording the remote (75% of both sexes wouldn't relinquish control when asked nicely) and forgetting their wedding anniversary (actually, this happens by the third year of marriage to 83% of couples).
Her husband believes he's having an affair; she wants to keep it that way.
Yesterday's New York Times Modern Love column was by Alix Kates Shulman, author of To Love What Is: A Marriage Transformed. Shulman, an elderly woman, is the primary caretaker of her husband, who lost his short-term memory and his ability to function alone, when he was injured in a fall four years ago. Shulman wrote about her husband's belief that he was having an affair with his companion, Jenn. Shulman hired Jenn to care of her husband during the day—to take him on walks, to the museum, to be by his side always so he can function in the world.
Recalling the man she would have married, the author realizes her husband is the one for her.
Judith Newman discovers that a New Year's Eve car ride with her husband was the perfect moment to fall in love all over again. "It was New Year's eve and John and I were fighting again as we drive back to New York City. But distressing as the situation was, I was already beginning to see the humor: our kids would be dropouts at age four! John, however, did not. After a half hour of recriminations, we both descended into silence. A great way to begin the new year, I thought bitterly. And, as always happened after these marital tsunamis, I began thinking: What would my life be like if I'd married the other one?"
Lucinda Franks reflects on 30 years of marriage with a man 30 years older.
The May-December marriage of a young; hippie journalist and a 58-year-old district attorney shocked the couple’s friends and families. Eight elections; one Pulitzer; two kids; and almost three decades later; the age difference makes some things even sweeter.
Olympia Dukakis reveals the secrets of a 40-year marriage to Louis Zorich.
After more than four decades of married life; Olympia Dukakis and Louis Zorich's credits include two illustrious acting careers; three kids; three grandkids; one Academy Award; and a profound sense of partnership. Dukakis looks back on their journey.
