It is impossible for me to even estimate the number of times I hear couples in my office say their partner doesn’t listen or understand. Often both people will say it. As my practice is in Silicon Valley, home of some of the brightest people on the planet, one would think understanding would come easier. Maybe it has to do with concentration. So I’ll give you a test to check your powers of concentration.
As a therapist who sees teenagers, I get this questioned posed to me often…Stacy, I don’t want my child to drop out of school, but they refuse to go and I don’t know what to do. What should I do? I often approach this topic from “what is your child communicating to the rest of us that we aren’t hearing?”
The way that you argue is often modeled on the way that your parents argued when you were young and this can often be a pattern that we carry with us through time. I want to teach you a method that will stop your discussions from turning in to arguments, it really will prove very useful, whether you are at odds with a partner, a family member or a friend.
What do Women Want? 1:Women Want Connection Connection to ourselves, connection to eachother, connection to the universe. 2:Women Want To Be Seen The inner self, who they really are deep down. 3.Women Want To Be Heard To know that you have been listening and heard them.
When you tell your wife you are truly listening and paying attention, it is very important to mean it. This is because your wife knows when you are actually paying attention and when you are not. You might look like and act like you're listening, but your wife intuitively knows that you're really tuning her out!
Yeah, you had been out for a couple of drinks and you knew you had said too much already. But this one, this was the worst fight you've ever had and you are scared. You can't remember if it was you or he that said the "D" word first. But now that divorce is in the conversation, do you feel like it could really be over?
These are tough economic times. Whether we have been hard hit by the economic recession through the loss of our job, concerned or depressed by the loss of our savings for retirement or in real estate, or worried about the future ... we are stressed. It is crucial to understand the different ways we deal with stress as men and women and to learn how to best meet each other's emotional needs.
It seemed so promising in the beginning. They were both passionate about politics. They both felt it was important to engage in activism, to join the public debate. They wanted to be of service to their country. Granted, her education level was higher. He dropped out of college, she went to Law School. But they were both widely read and interested in what was happening, and an increasing number of women are now more educated than their men anyway.
We all know how to communicate. If I stick my tongue out at someone they will get the gist of what I am communicating to them, however, their response may not be very positive and full clarity in our communication may never happen. To truly communicate in a way that other people can hear without defensiveness or heightened emotion is a skill. Slowing down and thinking about how you are getting your point across to someone while using these skills will help in all areas of your life, be it work, relationships or just trying to get your coffee order across at Starbucks.
by Mark Hunter, PCC Listening is your greatest tool in any relationship. My wife is naturally a great listener. I find her reflecting things I said to her that I don't even remember saying (often to her great benefit and amusement as you might imagine.)
As women, we all know hard it is to get our men to understand us. We talk to them and then we get the stare — you know, the one that looks like we just spoke a foreign language? Either he does that or he will respond with something completely off base or something that makes you really upset. This is when the argument begins and ruins the whole night or day. For the sake of improving your relationship and helping your man understand the women's language, check out these ways to get your man to understand.
SHOULD YOU BECOME A LIFE/CAREER COACH & HOW TO FIND THE COACH TRAINING THAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU Presented by: Marianna Lead, PhD, PCC, ICF (Int’l Coach Federation) Credentialing Examination Assessor and Founder/Executive Director of Goal Imagery Institute. Her guide "Finding the Right Coach Training for You" was published in Sept. 2011 issue of ICF Coaching World newsletter. In this FREE teleclass / webinar you will:
INTRODUCTION Do you feel misunderstood by your partner? Seem to keep getting into repetitive arguments over the same things? Have hidden resentments toward him and a mountain of unmet needs? If you're like a lot of other gay couples, chances are your listening skills might need a jump-start; and if it's not that, then fine-tuning your ability to listen can go a long way toward bridging the gap between you and your lover and bringing about more clarity and connection in your relationship.
I married a man who invented the strong-silent type. He is quiet, logical and often taken aback by my less logical more emotional responses to issues such as him eating the last cookie or telling me that maybe I might look better in another outfit. And while he gets how to do our taxes and exactly how dew point relates to airplanes leaving trails in the sky, he doesn't get that sometimes, I need to know how he feels about an issue and "nothing" is not an emotion. Curiously, it took a mutual affection for the show Dexter, which chronicles the life of a serial killer trying to function in a normal relationship, to get my husband to open up.