This is Your Wake-up Call (Or, Story of the Disappointing Penis)
Community

This is Your Wake-up Call (Or, Story of the Disappointing Penis)

by Panty Parade / Off Go the Panties Waking up disoriented in a strange hotel room sounds like the beginnings of an urban legend. Maybe it was because I hadn’t had all that much to drink the night before OR maybe because my dog was there beside me OR maybe because my host had left hours earlier—but I did not find WELCOME TO AIDS scrawled in lipstick on the bathroom mirror or a stranger soaking in an ice-filled bathtub with a recently removed kidney. I did find a few spent condoms in the trash.

Winners Can Be Choosers
Community

Winners Can Be Choosers

by Julie Robinson Just last month I won a goodies bag chock full of sex toys. A beautiful, pink vibrator bigger than most cocks I’ve seen, anyway. Slimy lube. Silky panties. Breath mints. Other people might say, “I can’t believe my luck!” I just say, “Yeah, I win shit.” Big shit. I’ve won a weekend in San Francisco, a Mediterranean cruise, a week to the South of France, and a weekend in Omaha, Nebraska (don’t ask).

Make My Day
Community

Make My Day

by Julie Robinson   Over the years I’ve become quite skilled at doing exactly what I want, when I want, simply because I want. This approach to life—make every day count—is a choice that has left me happy/completely broke/sexually charged/selfish and for the most part I’m okay with that. Here’s my recipe for preparing for a day of self-indulgence: 1 C of waking up without an alarm at a time that completely suits me—sometimes early, sometimes late

going stag
Tomfoolery

Do NOT Take A Friend To A Wedding

The traditional wedding season is not long from running its course this summer (and get ready to put your white pants and shoes away while you're at it) but I have some advice for you anyway as some of your "cheapskate" friends will sneak a wedding in during a fall or winter month. Whenever the wedding may be held, you should strongly consider going stag.