Needy women attract good men. "Low-maintenance" women attract jerks … or no men at all.
End your pattern by becoming aware. Uber aware. Know what triggers your pattern (e.g., what tips off that nightly conversation) so you can stop the cycle before it starts running without your permission. Then decide how you want to act instead. What's your ideal state if your pattern didn't exist? Consciously replace your patterned response with an action that matches how you want things to look.
Life is too short and too precious to waste time being unhappy, resentful or dissatisfied. You are the only one responsible for your own perceptions of the reality that you live in and you are the only one who can change it! Every moment offers a choice of what we think, say and do. We never know when our last day of living may be, so it is important to live life to its fullest and make the most of what we have at this time. But how can we do this when we feel “stuck”?
The happiness of people in our social networks matters MUCH more than you think. Here’s why: Our friends influence what we think of as normal, and that influences our habits, feelings, and behavior, which, in turn, make us happy. Or not. It is somewhat unbelievable, I know, but research shows beyond a shadow of a doubt that my next-door neighbor’s best-friend’s co-worker–whom I’ve never met–often influences how happy I am.
That Apple CEO Steve Jobs, who died today, Oct. 5, 2011, was a visionary on a large scale is undisputed, but it's the small-scale personal ways in which he has affected all of our lives that really resonate. And not just by making our lives more convenient with his products, but by inspiring us to live better with his own life.
The mass of men live lives of quiet desperation ~Thoreau If you have eyes to see, you’ll see it everywhere. If you listen carefully, you’ll hear it. Most times, logging into Facebook provides an overwhelming dose of it. Desperation. It looks a lot like the person who can’t wait for the weekend. It sounds like the person who walks into the office saying “I hate Monday!!”. It’s the person who hates their job but needs the money.
For twenty years I kept a journal in which I wrote about heartbreak, anxiety, and addiction. It was my only outlet from my pain, my way to give voice to my fears. But today my journal entries reflect an empowered woman who is happy and bleeds authenticity. I’ve overcome my addictions to love, drugs, food, work and fear. I worked hard, and man, was it worth it. What changed?
My name is Gabrielle and I’m a recovering over-thinker. “Recovering” is the operative word. For the past 15 years, I’ve worked hard to overcome my addiction to over-thinking. I was 16 when I realized I was addicted to my thoughts. These thoughts were merely fearful illusions I’d created based on my past experiences and my uncertainty about the future. I was totally consumed by my thoughts and they often manifested in the form of funky behavior.
Do you have a case of the "When I haves?" That tripped-up way of thinking goes something like this: "When I have that job," or "When I have that relationship," or "When I have that money . . . then I will be happy." It's a dangerous habit that leads to depressing, self-perpetuating thoughts like, "When will I get there?" and "Why am I not there yet?"
I stood there in my sweatpants, a bit disheveled, wanting to cry out, "No! You and I belong together!" But that was my need, not his. He walked off, his Bakugan backpack shining in the sun, without turning his head. I tightened my jacket around me. He caught sight of his friend, and slung his arm around his shoulders, a gesture that seemed more mature than he was. They disappeared into the school, laughing, tilting their faces towards one another. And just like that, the cord was severed.
Are you yearning for someone to love? Or are you in love and want to be sure it will last and grow deeper and richer with time? These are wonderful goals—and so few people achieve them! You can be one of these lucky ones if you don’t fall into the hidden traps that make loving so difficult. For that you need to bring your understanding and practice of love to an entirely new level.
Could you have “good” without evil? Left without right? Up without down? How about can you have a happy, fulfilled relationship without a power struggle or challenges? (No!) My great friend Richard Walker says, “True happiness can’t be achieved without experiencing true sadness and loss.”
Economist Bryan Caplan, author of Selfish Reasons to Have Kids, offers a suggestion for parents that sounds at once obvious and dangerous in today's hyper-parented society: want to be a happier parent? Back off from parenting. Helicopter parenting, that is. Rather than feeling as if you need to hover about your child at all waking moments, if you feel your own sanity starting to slip: put on a DVD, call the babysitter, and spend some time on your personal needs
Happiness has more to do with individual choices, lifestyle and one's spouse or partner than it does with childhood, personality or genetics, according to new research. A comprehensive 25-year psychological study claims to have debunked the theory that long-term happiness in adulthood has strong ties to genetic makeup, personality traits and childhood experiences.
Daily happiness doesn't have to be elusive. The trick: Seeking out easy ways to boost your satisfaction in every moment. While conducting research for her book, Bluebird: Women and the New Psychology of Happiness, Ariel Gore found that by tending to our happiness, we can boost it. "What we focus on grows, so if you water your happiness, you will search for and notice your happiness more, and therefore it goes up," she says. Here, we give you seven simple ways to help your happiness bloom.
In the past week, I was blessed with information that brought incredible healing and love to my meditation students at Equinox Fitness. I want to share this with you, since it was, and is, such a powerful meditation. You can record it for yourself, or do it with friends with one person reading the meditation: