HAPPINESS IN RELATIONSHIP

Today is my mentor's 88th birthday and I want to take this occasion to publically record the lessons I've learned from him in my life. Dr. William Glasser is the creator of Choice Theory and Reality Therapy. The most important thing for health and happiness is positive, strong relationships in one's life.

"How could you have done this to me, to us? Who are you and who did I marry?" With tears in his eyes, my ex-husband shouted and screamed these questions at me on the day he found out that I'd had an affair.

Sometimes love is blind, especially when your partners supports the opposing political party. But, even a loving relationship can combust when those contrasting viewpoints lead to conflicts.

Have you ever dated a guy and for the most part, things are good? He’s smart, funny, and attractive. He hits most of your major “must haves” however; there is one thing that bothers the hell out of you…. His mother! Does it seem like she is always around, sticking her nose into your relationship with him? She is needy and constantly calls him no matter how minor or severe the crisis of the day may be? She comes over unannounced, cooks cleans and does his laundry.

No matter how wonderful being in a relationship with someone is there will always be stressful times and challenges. Relationships reveal to us who we are and the personal growth we need to do. Stressors like: Worrying about money, the economy, your children, your job, etc. trigger the release of adrenalin and stress hormones such as cortisol. When chronically stressed, we tend to be at our worst in relating and coping. We often trigger stress in others which creates a reinforcing loop adding to the malaise.

The Numbers Are Staggering. In the United States alone, it estimated that 18.8 million people suffer from a depressive disorder in any given year. That translates into nearly 10% of the US population. Worldwide, that number is estimated at more than 120 million. According to the American Medical Association, more than twice as many women (estimated at 25% of the population) experience depression as men (estimated at 12%), regardless of racial background or financial status. 

Relationships require both parties to put in the neccessary work to stay happy. For some, the work needed is more difficult than others. Yet, all of your efforts will pay off when you and your partner are living in relational bliss. Here are 10 tips to achieving passion and happiness in your relationship.

Long term relationships can become routine, boring and stale.  Here are a few suggestions to keep the relationship fresh. 1.Choose to look at the whole picture. The glass is half full and half empty  ALWAYS. You can choose to look at what makes you unhappy, or you can choose to consider seeing both the glass half empty and half full (which is the real deal). Unless you are seeing the whole perspective, you will not be getting a realistic view.

By Nan O'Brien, Intuitive Counselor for GALTime TODAY'S DAY STARTER Much of the pleasure of life is reduced by the innate tendency to compete with others, whether in terms of possessions (house, car, electronic gadgets), opinions (political, religious, parenting), and/or experiences (places visited, people you know or have met). Life is not about having a contest, it is about being authentic and truthful, and embracing experiences for the experience's sake.

I frequently refer to Gary Chapman's Five Love Languages. It is one of my highly recommended reads. The concepts are key to understanding how to contribute to your mate's sense of well being. What can happen in a relationship is that each one tries hard to be loving, yet each remains feeling unloved. The book explains why such a comedy of errors can occur. It also describes in detail how to meet the needs of the one you love so that they will feel it.

  Today I looked over at my husband and realised how right my world is!! Laying on his stomach across our bed, with his nose stuck in a book, I saw my happiness. We have been married ten years next month and I feel like I have always been married to this man. So many people told me not to marry him...the age difference and all....but I listened to my heart and did what was right for me...and my children! I have six kids and luckily for me they all love Bill...the two youngest call him daddy.

If you're happy and you know it, well, chances are you're young, married and childless. If you're British, that is. Initial findings from the U.K.'s Understanding Society study show that young, hitched couples without kids had the most satisfying relationships. The survey is tracking 40,000 households over the next two decades to get a better handle on people's lives, experiences and, presumably, bucket lists.

This guest article from Psych Central was written by Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S. As a couple, when you’re dealing with the many demands of day-to-day life, it can feel like the fun has been zapped from your relationship. But contrary to popular opinion, you don’t necessarily have to do anything spectacular or pricey to bring the enjoyment back.