Our everyday life is full of manipulation whether we are aware of it or not. Some salesman on the doorway, some doctors, some teachers, some officials, or some co-workers might use unfair communication tactics to get what they want. The difficulty is more serious if the manipulator lives with the family, not to mention if the manipulator is our otherwise beloved partner. S/he can be wonderful in various areas in our life but they still might use debilitating pressure on us towards others.
GUILT IN RELATIONSHIPS
What you say? I've been taught to be of service, the community comes first. I pride myself on helping others. It sounds pretty selfish to me. How can I do that? You don't understand! I've got kids, a job, a husband, an ailing parent to take care of, a to do list that won't quit! I do get it. Totally! I've been there, held hostage in the vice of my inner critic who would claim to the world that I must do it all in some underlying guise of nobility. It's a booby trap!
How many times have I felt that way and how often have I heard this sigh coming from others before I began to deal with Emotional Manipulation? Weeding out manipulative attempts from straightforward communication or rightful influence is not always an easy ride. Cloud of negative emotions Before I recognize my emotions, I feel my heart pounding and my breathing becomes labored.
Did you ever get a call from an ex out of the blue and they say, “I think we should get back together.” This is one of those calls that makes you happy and upset at the same time. You’re happy that they came to the conclusion that they can’t live without you. (Ah-ha, you knew they’d come back!) However, you’re upset because you realized they were too late and that ship has sailed.
Question: My question is a little unique. I am considering remarriage to a wonderful man, however; I have a daughter who is legally blind, and she has a beautiful 3- year-old daughter. If I remarry, I would be moving out of state. My daughter is not anywhere near being self sufficient and I am not going to just abandon her. My fiancé has said that he would wait as long as it takes for me to help my daughter become independent. Neither my fiancé nor I have plans to break up if this process does not move as fast as we had hoped.
If you are a woman who has cheated on her husband or boyfriend and you are now dealing with the destructive aftermath and feeling extremely guilty, I empathize. I, like you, have been where you are and it's a difficult place to escape ... if you don't know how.
Giving to others can be one of the most fulfilling experiences in life, or it can be one of the most draining. What makes the difference? The difference has to do with WHY you are giving to others. Giving From A Full Heart When we give from a full heart, we are giving because we are so filled up with love that it is overflowing, and we receive great joy in giving to others.
Guilt is a very powerful emotion, just like all the emotions, if you are not aware of its power and tend to feel often, you may not even realize that it is the driving force behind everything you do and how you do it. Apparently for women it is more likely to rear its head than it is for men and this is usually because as women we are conditioned to be nice and play nice.
We can learn so much from our pets, in their innocence and purity of heart. They enjoy every moment, they are always excited about the future, and, most of all, they are completely shameless. They live in the present moment, carry no guilt or negative emotions over their actions of the past and, no matter what, they love well. My beautiful puppy Ethan thinks nothing of rolling over and exposing his soft underbelly to be rubbed, whether to me or a complete stranger. He is not ashamed to show who he is, or ask for what he wants.
A friend of mine recently said to me that when we have feelings of guilt it is because there is an element of knowing that you did something right, or something that you had to do for yourself but for some reason you feel bad about. And, it got me thinking, I repeated it, “There is an element of good in the reasons we feel guilt.” In all of my articles about holding onto your power and all this emphasis and work I do around self empowerment, I hadn’t in writing, yet acknowledged the one thing that underlies the reason we lose so much of our power.
What is it that compels us to stay in relationships that aren't good for us? There are many reasons, but more often than not, it's a combination of several motivations. The first step towards making your situation better is in understanding why you're making the choices you're making to begin with.
Do you find yourself doing, doing, doing for everyone but yourself and then feeling consumed by guilt when you decide to take time for you or set limits around your availability or what you’re willing to do for others? Do you label yourself as “selfish” when you want to do something for yourself or even by yourself? Do you ever feel ashamed because there are times you don’t want to do anything for anybody else?
What Women Don’t Know About Men: Part Three In this segment I’ll be discussing a certain “type” of Men. • The sort of men who are engaged in self-reflection. • The sort of men who take seminars and workshops to better themselves and their relationships. • The sort of men who understand the importance of listening.
In the first segment to this series I said that 50% of the population has a “broken picker”. This is because Chemistry is a result of a “hard wired” energetic pattern you were born with. The old adage that “Men are attracted to women like their mothers” and “Women are attracted to men like their fathers” is true.
"My wife is so upset that I have to travel more on my new job," Chuck told me in our phone counseling session. "She feels so alone and lost when I'm gone. When I talk with her she is either crying or angry. I feel so badly and guilty but I don't know what to do." "Do you feel responsibility for her feelings?" I asked him. "Do you feel that you are the cause of her feelings?" "Yes."
This guest article from Psych Central was written by Suzanne Phillips, Psy.D. When one partner "wrongs" another, the ensuing guilt can have a major impact on the relationship. Let's take a look at apologies and why they can be reparative: An Apology — The Expression of Guilt