Breakups are difficult and the aftermath is not much better. That pain in your heart will only heal with time. For those of you that are tired of waiting, these 4 steps can make you heal faster.
GETTING OVER IT
When your significant other does or says something that upsets you — depending on the size of the affront and the depth of your reaction — you might shut down and stop listening, especially if your partner's tone conveys judgment or derision. You may withdraw for a period of time or retaliate with criticism of your own. Either behavior results in a negative circle of energy and delays understanding and healing.
Mothers want to see their children succeed. Newlyweds believe their love is special and will last throughout eternity. Best friends make declarations that they can weather life’s storms together , forever, come rain, sleet, hail, marriage, children, and cross continental relocations. We’ve all felt the kind of certainty about our relationships that leaves no room for doubt, but sometimes the best laid plans, wrapped in the noblest of intentions , simply don’t work out and the only move we can make… is to move on.
We never try to bring flowers back to life when they have died. We thank them for the beauty they have graced us with and allow them to rest in peace. So why do we insist on resuscitating the pain of past relationships that clearly withered on the vine long ago?
By Sheila Robinson-Kiss, MSW, LCSW Five years ago I was utterly devastated when a relationship went up in a ball of flames. Nothing made sense. I gave that relationship my all and none of that mattered after the rug was pulled from underneath my feet. I had landed on the concrete. My spirit was broken and my ego was cracked. I had fallen into a foggy slump, spending my days binging on the Lifetime Television Network and playing video games. Just when I thought the bar couldn’t dip any lower, the door bell rang one night.