50 Things You Should Try For Hotter Sex

My Most Regrettable Breakup Behavior


My Most Regrettable Breakup Behavior [EXPERT]
What's the worst thing you've ever done to an ex?
Breaking up is hard to do ... and revenge is just so tempting!

Join YourTango Expert GalTime on our Facebook page Thursday, November 8 at 2 p.m. EST to ask all of your questions about love and relationships!

I recently read an article about how to exit a relationship gracefully, hoping to see myself in its words. After all, I went through a pretty nasty divorce that dragged on for a year-and-a-half before the 11-year relationship was legally deemed over. And, following that, there were many online dating one-dinner or months-long relationship endings.

More from YourTango: Want To Improve Your Marriage? Get Organized With Weekly Meetings

I have had plenty of relationship experience, and, I thought, there had to be a fair amount tactful exits among them. But graceful goodbyes? Not so much. Instead of recalling moments of quietly closing the door behind me, I mostly remembered revolving, slamming and sneaking out of doors. Not pretty.

Related: How to make a quick exit on a bad date

I've had my moments of being the adult in the situation, mustering up respectfulness, clarity and conciseness in cutting myself loose. Once, in a pub over a quiet lunch, I told a man I'd been dating for a few months that, sadly, in the weeks since we'd last seen each other, I'd realized I wasn't interested in pursuing this relationship. I told him a few things I liked about him, reassured him about some fun times we'd shares and then underlined that it was time for me to move on.

More from YourTango: How Often Should You Bathe Your Baby?

I was really proud of myself in that moment ... until he started sobbing ... and sent his fish and chips back, telling the server he had completely lost his appetite. As graceful as I thought I was in that moment, he clearly did not see the situation in the same way. Years later, he got in touch to tell me how brutally I'd broken his heart. I was baffled, especially considering how calm and kind I thought I'd been.

More breakup advice from YourTango:

Share this with someone you love (or even like a lot)!

Let's make it
FB official
Recent Expert Posts
cozy up

Showing Love Through Touch

Touch is so incredibly important in relationships.


Listen Up, Darling: A Sex Kitten Is Never Hangry or Tired

Recently I shared eight surprising traits of a sex kitten. Each of those traits are ones that ...

happy couple older

Just Say No: The 4 Types of People You Shouldn't Date

You can avoid bad relationships simply by avoiding certain types of people.

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

How to find the right pro for you
10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

10 Reasons Mental Health Pros Should Join YourTango Experts

YourTango Experts can help your business go from good to great.

10 Steps To Improve Your Coaching Business

Take your coaching business from mediocre to great in no time…

Frequently Asked Questions About YourTango Experts

Thinking of joining? Here's all the facts you need to know to make the most of your membership.

Getting Your Guy To Join You In A Therapy Or Coaching Session

So how can your get your strong, self-reliant, superman to talk to an Expert with you?

Therapist/Counselors: Who We Are & What We Do

What exactly does a therapist/counselor do and can they really help?

See more resources>