Where do you think you’ll be in 2015? Where would you like to be? Think about it carefully, thoughtfully. Drift into Possibility Thinking mode. Feels wonderful, right? One of the most precious gifts we’re given as human beings is our ability to create our own destiny or vision. It’s a crime that so many people never accept this gift. Others prefer to just give it away, making someone else responsible for it. Think about what you can get done in the next five years. The possibilities are endless, aren’t they? Think about where you were and what you were doing back in 2005. Look at what has changed since then. For most of us, quite a lot. I have a question for you… What are you thinking about doing right now that might take some time to come to make happen? Are you working on a degree or certification? Are you considering taking that dream vacation you’ve being dreaming about for so long? Do you want to change careers? Do you want to lose some weight?
Even when it feels right, moving for love is a total leap of faith and it certainly was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done. But there are a few questions you can ask yourself to help decide if following love to another city is a good move for you.
Picture this: It's the second course of an exquisite meal on your second date with an exquisite guy. From his first Match.com wink you thought to yourself, "he seems too good to be true" but, lo and behold, the real-life version measured up to his digital one. As you take in every one of his charming words, mesmerized by the way his lips wrap around his wine glass, you drift into fantasyland thinking, "Wow, he would make an amazing softball coach to our kids. I wonder if he's available the second weekend of June to go to my cousin's wedding. He's a guy I would give up my last name for." But you know what he's thinking? He's thinking, "I wonder if my roommate is home. Man, her cleavage is hot. We should probably switch from wine to liquor so she doesn't get sleepy and pass out on my sofa." His thoughts are nothing like yours... and as much as we hate to admit it, given how well you know each other (and his testosterone levels), his head is probably the one that's on straight.
Over the weekend, Psychological Science published a study saying that people are happier when they spend more time discussing meaningful topics than engaging in small talk. Seventy-nine college students had their conversations recorded and analyzed by researchers, who distinguished between chit-chat about the food or the weather from discussions about philosophy, education, or religion. Subjects who reported the greatest amount of satisfaction spent only 10 percent of their conversation on small talk, while the unhappiest subjects kept 28.3 of their talking time in the shallow end.