We spend lots of money and time preparing for the wedding day. The penguin suits and puffy white dresses, cakes, champagne, the guests, where the service will be, then the reception. A lot of work for just a few hours of time. Often, we spend more time and energy preparing for the wedding, than we do preparing for the marriage. What would happen if we actually prepared ourselves for marriage, not just the wedding? What might that ‘preparing the garden’ process look like? Read on for three tips to prepare YOUR garden for marriage!
The world outside shifts quickly when you're at home. It starts to feel too big; there's too much you need to protect your children from in it. But the truth is that the world outside isn't too big; it’s that when you let a part of yourself go—like your career—your world becomes smaller. And without balance, you lose perspective, a sense of proportion.
Recovering from an unexpected financial crisis involves both a plan and an attitude shift. Sure, bad things happen unexpectedly, but the way out of them is smart thinking and a strategy. If you find yourself facing a money emergency, here's how to get out of it with grace.
Sometimes turning the tides on a "bad" financial situation happens more easily by looking at what smart couples are doing to create "great" situations. Experts Denise Wade and Anne Alexander Vincent weighed in on this topic and offer the following quick tips as a menu. Even one or two of them done consistently will help to turn things around into the black (or the green!).
Money conflicts result in some of the most intense and destructive arguments in any relationship. Money is a topic very few people are comfortable talking about, and issues concerning spending and saving are deeply personal. The additional variable that's been silently added to the mix is the turning of the tides in many relationships for who is the primary breadwinner. Here are five tips for keeping a breadwinner relationship tension-free.
I know this sounds crazy, but I believe it is best to prepare for divorce before you even get married. As a romantic, I hate this. As a divorce attorney, mediator and coach, I've seen the worst of the worst walk through my office door and cannot tell you how priceless this advice actually is. Being prepared for the unexpected may be one of the smartest decisions you'll ever make.
D-E-B-T is a dirty four letter word in any love relationship. Money seems to be a sensitive subject for most, yet the topic cannot be avoided when you’re sharing your life with someone. As debt surfaces in your relationship, the tensions rise and daily interactions between you and your partner drastically change. For folks who have debt that is out of control, they are often stuck in a spiral of negative emotions. Feelings that can range from regret to shame, guilt to embarrassment, hopelessness to despair, disappointment to depression, worry to fear and frustration to rage. As arguments escalate and fears rise, the feelings can become more than either person can handle. You’re left feeling like the world is spinning out of control and you’re not quite sure how to get off the ride.
Money is one of those super-charged topics that can turn a conversation from lukewarm to boiling in an instant. Money conversations can bring even the level-headed to an emotional breaking point when their anxiety rises to the surface. Is it our mistaken beliefs about money (that we'd miraculously be happier, better looking, attractive, secure etc. if we had more of it) that has created the place for such a hot button response? It's a good question to ask because our lack of understanding about why we react the way we do is one of the reasons we're plagued with such childlike fears around money. To gain control of your money fears, first you have to understand them.
When it comes to love, one of the hardest areas for couples to successfully, and harmoniously, navigate is their wallets. It's well known that money is a leading cause of divorce. And in the therapist's office, a well-tested belief is that sex and money are two of the most important issues to talk over—so much so that the belief is that if you're not talking about sex and money, someone (and maybe it's the therapist) is in denial! Money is a major force in most relationships—this week, Experts teach us how to harness its power.
As a self proclaimed feminist, I was surprised by how hobbled I was by my love for our first born, that I, who’d argued for years how important it was that women remain in the workforce after giving birth, couldn’t imagine being anywhere but home. I'd always prided myself on being independent and self sufficient, secure on my own two feet. Now, without a paycheck, I felt lost, unsure of my worth.
If you feel like you're dating your financial opposite, you're probably right. It turns out we gravitate towards romantic partners with conflicting money attitudes to help balance our own tendencies.
They say that if you take care of your money, it will eventually take care of you. Sounds simple enough, doesn't it? It raises the question, though: How strong a caregiver are you? I like to think of it this way: In the giddy, blissful early days of a new relationship, the stars seems to align and everything in the relationship flows. We're in looove. We are constantly thinking about one another, calling all the time, checking in frequently, delighting in each other's tiniest quirks and relishing every moment spent together.
Per a study conducted by Harris Interactive, 31% of couples (over 2,000 were polled) have committed financial perfidy. The findings were very interesting and two items in particular stuck out: 1) The most common shadiness was that 58% of people admit to hiding cash; and 2) 15% of respondents have hidden a banking account. It was also revealed that men and women were just as likely to hide money.
Tips on finances, married sex, awesome advice from marrieds like you and other links we love this week.
There are necessities, like running water, and then there are "necessities," like HBO and a weekly pedicure. When you're single and supporting only yourself, you have every right to declare keeping your toes in the latest shade of blush a priority. But once you join budgets with your partner, it's important that you both agree on which expenses qualify as non-negotiable.
We all fear discovering an unfamiliar perfume lingering on our man's collar or a smudge of lipstick that isn't our shade, but sometimes his cheating isn't with another woman … it's with his wallet. Maybe you found a statement for a credit card you never knew existed, or suspect he's been blowing the cash you thought he was saving for retirement. When your faith in your partner's honesty and financial fidelity is shaken, how do you keep it from tearing your relationship apart? Manisha Thakor offers the following advice for coping after he's been fiscally unfaithful.