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Move In Together, Fight-Free

Move In Together, Fight-Free

Moving in together is a big step. It leads to consolidating; reorganization; and new realizations. Every now and again getting rid of your old stuff is harder than you think and for reasons you may not want to think about. Kelly Bare explains that talking about these relics may lead to a new appreciation of your partner and new insight to your relationship.

Wedding Planning 101

Wedding Planning 101

It turns out that planning a wedding isn't that easy. The stress of minor issues such as where to have a wedding can be overwhelming. Now throw in the guest list, a wedding budget, and the inlaws and even the sweetest woman can turn into a bridezilla... months and months before the actual wedding. Kelly Bare explores the idea of that it's not 100% 'your day' after all and that a New York wedding probably isn't worth the hassle.

Handling A Partner's Unhealthy Habit

Handling A Partner's Unhealthy Habit

Nagging won't help; but a partner's unhealthy habit hurts more than his or her life expectancy. Taking on too much responsibility for a partner's bad habit is a classic sign of codependency‚ and an unhealthy dynamic in which one person becomes too wrapped up in the other. As she learns to cope with her husband's smoking; Meagan Francis also explores where his problem ends and hers begins. What does she find? "While it's OK to worry about a partner when they're doing unhealthy things, detaching from their habits—while keeping the lines of communication open—is key. Of course, there are some non-negotiables. Illegal drug use, heavy drinking, addictive gambling, and anything severely self-destructive may warrant a "quit or else" attitude. But for those not dealing with extreme cases, ultimatums aren't the answer, and neither is an expectation that your partner will comply with your wishes. Instead, use your mutual respect to reach a compromise."

Black And Female: Destined To Be Single?

Black And Female: Destined To Be Single?

As a successful black woman in corporate America I had a very hard time finding black men who understood and weren't intimidated by my busy lifestyle, weren't already dating or married to white women and who weren't gay. When I left the corporate world, and moved to black-man-friendly Brooklyn, I had a much easier time finding black men, unfortunately far too many of them were players. I'll admit though, I'd often choose a "bad boy" over a good prospective partner and have a bad experience, which then created a bad perception. That said, it seemed the odds were often stacked against me: 9 out of 10 times, the good-looking, smart, articulate, cultured black men I met were in multiple relationships, or either had a girlfriend or were married and "forgot" to tell me. In fact, had it not been for the tattoo of his wife's name on his arm, I might not have known that the last man I was out on a date with was married.