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Top 10 Causes Of Divorce

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Top 10 Causes Of Divorce [EXPERT]
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4. Not having a shared vision of success. "Everything changed when we got married!" He drives you crazy because you're a saver and he's a spender. Your idea of a weekend getaway is a cozy cottage in the woods; your partner wants to the hit the town and catch a game. He thinks it's your job to cook and clean, but you disagree.

Why didn't he mention these things before? Maybe you should have asked. Chances are that he hasn't changed — your expectations did. Is it possible to survive major differences in philosophy? It is possible, but many do not. —Lisa Payne

More from YourTango: 5 Easy Steps to Master the Art of Journaling

5. Intimacy. Somewhere in a marriage there is a subtle change in the intimacy department. One person has an off day, there is a misunderstanding or someone doesn't feel well ... and then he isn't as romantic or she isn't as sexual.

Whoever is the one with the subtle change can trigger a downward spiral in the intimacy department. Men generally need sexual receptivity to feel romantic and women generally need romance to be sexual receptive. As long as both people are getting what they need, they willingly provide what the other person wants.

However, when there is a lessening on either's part, that can trigger a pulling back in the other. If gone unnoticed and unchecked, before the couple realizes, they are seriously intimately estranged and wonder what happened. This can lead to divorce as couples begin to feel unloved and unappreciated. —Kim Olver

6. Unmet expectations. Somewhere written into a human's genetic code lie the instruction that when a person isn't happy, he or she is supposed to force his/her significant to make the changes required to make the unhappy person happy again. This usually takes the form of complaining, blaming, criticizing, nagging, threatening, punishing and/or bribing.

More from YourTango: My Journal: Best Friend, Companion, Healer

When one or both people in the marriage are attempting to coerce each other into doing things they don't want to do for their partner's happiness, it is a recipe for disaster. When you are unhappy in a relationship, it's okay to ask for the change you want. But, if your partner doesn't oblige you, then you become responsible for your own happiness. —Kim Olver

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Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Lisa L. Payne

Career Coach

Yours in possibility,

 

Lisa L. Payne

Life Transitions Coach

http://LisaLPayne.com

Author of What If They Knew? Secrets of an Impressive Woman

Join the conversation on my facebook page!

Location: St. John's, NL, Canada
Credentials: CPC
Advanced Member

Kim Olver

Speaker/Presenter

Kim Olver, LCPC, has been featured in Whole Living, Women's World, Fitness Magazine and Counseling Today and is the best-selling, award winning author of Secrets of Happy Couples: Loving Yourself, Your Partner, and Your Life.

Connect with Kim by signing up for her FREE InsideOut Relationship Advice Newsletter and receive a FREE recording about our Life Changing Process, InsideOut Empowerment and have access to FREE relationship assessments.

Check out new products that might be for you in my Webstore

Location: Country Club Hills (Chicago), IL
Credentials: LCPC, MS, NCC
Specialties: Communication Problems, Couples/Marital Issues, Empowering Women
Other Articles/News by Lisa L. Payne, Kim Olver:

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