15 Ways Your Self-Esteem Can Ruin Your Relationship

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15 Ways Your Self-Esteem Can Ruin Your Relationship [EXPERT]
Feeling a little insecure?
Find out how your self-confidence affects your love life.

7. Low self-confidence is unattractive. With low self-confidence you might be projecting neediness and desperation. That is certainly not attractive or sexy! —Dr. Shirley McNeal

8. Self-confidence is attractive. When you project self-confidence you are attractive and sexy! Your partner finds you all the more alluring and may want to make a definite commitment realizing how attractive you are to others as well. —Dr. Shirley McNeal

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9. Low self-esteem involves fear. Without enough self-esteem, you will be afraid to trust or show your vulnerability. Too much self-protectiveness limits the extent and depth of intimacy you can have with your partner. —Dr. Shirley McNeal

10. Self-esteem includes self acceptance. With a healthy self-esteem, you can accept both your strengths and your weaknesses. You can feel all right about being less than perfect and unafraid to show vulnerability. That kind of authenticity can deepen your intimate connection with your partner. —Dr. Shirley McNeal

11. You feel whatever you focus on.  If you focus on what an amazing, sexy goddess you are, that's exactly how you'll feel. The opposite of that is true as well. If you need a little shot of confidence and self-esteem, just close your eyes and remember a time you felt sexy and confident, and allow yourself to remember and feel all the details of that time. -Nancy Philpott

12. Your beliefs determine your confident, sexy state. What story have you been telling yourself about why you are or are not feeling sexy or confident? What would you have to believe in order to tell yourself those things? What would happen if you began telling yourself the truth? What will it cost you if you don't stop lying to yourself? -Nancy Philpott

13. Low confidence results in misunderstandings. It's important in any relationship to be able to express what you need. Maybe it's a desire to cuddle after sex or to have some alone time at the end of the day to decompress. If you don't share those needs because you're afraid of your partner's response, you'll become increasingly frustrated and he'll just feel hurt or confused. Work on loving yourself enough so you can make those requests and deepen your connection. -Deborah Roth

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14. More confidence means less drama. Have you ever heard a guy complain about his girl being too "low maintenance?" Chances are, it's just the opposite! When you feel secure about who you are and what you have to offer, your man doesn't have to walk on eggshells and your relationship becomes a drama-free zone. -Deborah Roth

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Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Mrs. Nancy Philpott

Relationship Coach

Nancy Philpott, RN, MS

Chief Transformation Officer

Consulting Hypnotherapist


Location: Round Rock, TX
Credentials: CHT, MS, RN
Specialties: Addiction, Anxiety Issues, Couples/Marital Issues, Dating/Being Single Support, Divorce/Divorce Prevention, Empowering Women, Holistic Coach, Life Transitions, Post Traumatic Stress / Trauma
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