The timing involved in synchronizing our physical intimacy is the key to why we often miss each other on the way to wanting the same thing. For women, it is the sense of romance and emotional connection which triggers sexual desire and access to arousal. Men rely on physical attraction and sensuous contact to unlock their ability to emote and feel deeply. Sometimes it feels like missing each other is a cruel joke built into our biology, and yet this can't be true, because nothing makes a relationship thrive like a rich, intimate life.
One way around this relationship landmine is the practice of gratitude. Expressing appreciation is the highest form of thought and the one that removes the experience of being taken for granted. Practice seeing the best parts of the relationship outside the bedroom and then bring those feelings of gratitude with you to your intimate time.
Also, remember that loving someone deeply embodies an ebb and flow. Do not give up on your partner if the situation doesn’t currently look the way you want it to. Thich Nhat Hanh once said, "Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today." Remember this on the days that are hard. Remember what you're most grateful for and watch your most intimate relationships grow freely both inside the bedroom and out.